Dean took the glass of water Sam offered him with a grin and nod of thanks, downing most of it in one go. Damn, that was good. He hadn’t realized just how thirsty he was, but considering how hot it was it wasn’t much of a surprise.

When Sam took the glass back from him before Dean could set it down himself, he raised an eyebrow with a little smirk. The heat he saw smoldering in the other man’s gaze making his body hot for a different reason, especially when Sam pulled him hard up against his body. The proof of exactly what he did to Sam, how his little displays had affected his lover, pressing hard into his stomach.

Dean couldn’t deny that knowing how hot and bothered he’d made Sam was a real turn on. He didn’t bother restraining the low groan of pleasure that escaped his lips when Sam kissed him and ran his hands down his body. His own arms wrapping around the vampire’s shoulders, holding onto Sam tightly as he pushed his lower body against the other man, rolling his hips a little letting the other man feel his own thickening need.

Fuck... the things Sam did to him too...

He grunted and bucked against Sam when he felt the other man’s hands on his ass, his reply lost in his lover’s mouth as a low needy moan. The way Sam touched him, looked at him, needed him, making him so damned hot. He was really, really, tempted to give into Sam’s suggestion, let the other man take him inside and fuck his brains out. But he knew if he waited... didn’t at least dry off his baby first... water spots... damn it...

With a groan of disappointment bordering and discomfort Dean forced himself to break their kiss. His jeans definitely didn’t feel as loose as they had a few minutes ago. The young man laughed and put a hand on Sam’s chest before the vampire could pull him back into another mind melting kiss. Dean thought he was insatiable. If this kept up he was going to have to keep a closer eye on Sam, make sure he wasn’t spiking his drinks with Viagra or anything.

“Just let me finish, promise I’ll make it worth your while, Sammy.” Dean promised with a little laugh, reaching around Sam to grab the towels and wax while he could. Heading back to the car before Sam could make him change his mind.

Sam devoured Dean's groan and felt Dean's thrust against him and groaned back.

What the fuck? No, no, no.

Sam sighed in frustration. "Okay, gotta work on my seduction, apparently," Sam said, letting Dean get away with grabbing the towels and wax. "But you better only put one coat of wax on her or I swear, I'll pull you into that back seat and shout loud enough to draw Bobby and Jake out front," he threatened. He meant it, too.

"I'm going to get you more water. You get dehydrated and it'll be a whole lot less fun," Sam called out to him as he headed back in. "And don't you get sunburned!"

Sam walked into the kitchen, knowing he had a full-on boner going and not giving a shit. All he could think about was Dean's wet skin under his hands and the scorching kiss and the feel of Dean's ass.

"You need baggier jeans, Sammy," Jake teased. "That looks uncomfortable."

"Bite me," Sam told Jake, but his voice held no venom what so ever.

"That's your job, young 'un."

"I've got you by almost seventy years, young 'un," Sam retorted as he filled up a pitcher with water and dumped ice into it. "Hmm, wonder if I can find a stripper with breasts the size of poppy seeds."

"Not funny Sammy," Jake said with a mock glare.

"Oh, it's going to be hilarious. As flat chested as roadkill. Maybe I can find one with a few teeth missing or something. They need love too." Sam groaned a little as he turned, the jeans rubbing in all the wrong spots.

"Do vampires get blue-balls?" Bobby asked Jake.

"Yup. Just don't last as long for 'em."

For whatever reason, Bobby's question did bring an embarrassed blush to his face. "Jesus and I thought Jake was bad. The two of you. Hell, you were made for each other."

Bobby and Jacob broke into laughter while Sam walked back to the bedroom. He paused at the door. He could just barely smell the hint of old blood, his or Dean's he wasn't sure. His mind flashed to what had happened in this bedroom all so recently. He smiled a little. Who would have thought they would end up back here as boyfriends, as lovers. He laughed a little when he saw Jake had already det the lubricant out on the nightstand. He slid it down into the drawer. He didn't need Dean thinking he had done that. Shaking himself out of his brief reverie (he did want to get back to the show, after all) he grabbed the bottle of sunblock and head back out front. He filled up a fresh glass of water and and carried it and the sunblock out to Dean.

"Drink. Then put this on. And don't even ask me to put this on your back if you really want to get your car waxed."

“I think you need to work more on your threats.” Dean laughed back at Sam as he walked to his car, adjusting himself a little more comfortably in his jeans as he did. Sam certainly didn’t have any problem in the seduction department but… lines had to be drawn somewhere.

Dean immediately set to work drying off the excess water from his baby and putting the first coat of wax on her. Yeah, he’d only do one coat. Now anyway. He might still put another coat on her later, but not until he had taken care of his other baby.

The young man smiled a little at that thought.

By the time Sam had returned, Dean had already felt sweat forming on his back between his shoulder blades. Fuck, it was hot out here. He was almost regretting not parking in the shade after all. As he worked Dean couldn’t help but wonder if the sun was just really that bad, or if maybe he was more sensitive to it now after everything.

He knew he should probably talk to Jacob a bit more about what it meant to be an “anti-Vampire” as Sam had once put it. He definitely had heightened senses. He healed quicker than he should. Maybe the sunlight bothered him too more than normal? Not as bad as a full blooded vampire for certain, but enough that maybe he should be more aware of it.

Dean stopped what he was doing and turned when he heard the crunch of gravel behind him and he was more than glad to accept the new glass of water that Sam had brought out for him. The young man quickly drained the glass and then took the sun block, not even making a face as he squeezed some out and started putting it on his face without complaint. That in itself might have been enough of an answer about his sensitivity to the light…

He began to rub it on his arms next and Dean raised an eyebrow when Sam “warned” him not to ask him to put it on his back. Dean laughed and shook his head.

“Alright… I guess I’ll just have to put my shirt back on then. You don’t want me to burn, do you?” Dean teased the vampire before reaching down to grab his wet shirt off the ground.

Sam was turning to take the glass back to the porch when he heard Dean's comment and his eyes widened a little.

"Maybe I was a little hasty," Sam said returning to Dean's side and grabbing the sun block from Dean. After setting the glass down he squeezed a glob of lotion into his hand. He ignored the smirk on Dean's face and gave his shoulder a gentle nudge. "C'mon, turn around, you jerk."

When Dean did, Sam began smearing the sun block onto Dean's sweat drenched back, taking the time to massage it in a little even though the sun beating down on him was getting uncomfortable. He tried to keep his touch professional, but was failing as he couldn't help himself as his fingers traced out lines of muscle and his fingers gave gentle, promising caresses. His cock had begun to soften but when the touch of Dean's skin under his hands, it was right back up standing at attention.

Sam put a little more sun block on his hands and carefully went over Dean's neck, up and over his ears and then back down, running his hands all the way down Dean's sides, making sure he hadn't missed anything. With a grin, had got a little more lotion and slid his hands deep under Dean's waistband of his jeans.

"Don't want you stretching out and exposing unprotected skin," Sam murmured in his ear as he ran his hands halfway down Dean's ass, then around his hips, and down the front of his jeans, careful not to go any deeper than a good tease. "There, now you can show as much as you want."

Grinning, Sam pulled his hands out, smacked Dean hard on the butt, then snatched up the glass and Dean's wet t-shirt as he hurried for the shade of the porch before Dean could retaliate.

Dean didn't bother to hide his amused smirk when Sam quickly changed his mind and took the sun block from him. Sam was so damned easy.

"Bitch." He teased back, however he turned around as ordered. The first touch of the lotion was cold against his overheated skin but it quickly warmed under Sam's fingers as the other man massaged it in. Dean remembered how good it had felt the first time Sam had given him a massage. Feeling Sam's strong fingers working into his skin and muscles, easing the pain of his back and shoulders that had been so damned cramped from hanging in chains for three days.

He could honestly say it felt better now than it did then. Because then it had been only "business". Now Dean gave himself permission to really enjoy it. Now Sam's touch lingered longer. His caresses were more meaningful and Dean's cock reacted to Sam's every touch.

Dean didn't bother to hide his appreciation of Sam's talented hands at all. Moaning softly, especially when the other man's hands became even less professional, sliding his slick fingers underneath his jeans and rubbing them over his ass, thighs, and really close to his crotch. He'd half expected Sam's hand to curl around his cock and start jerking him off inside his jeans, and Dean certainly wouldn't have stopped him at that point.

It actually wasn't until Sam smacked him on the ass and hurried away… with his shirt… that Dean realized that the other man was done.

"Bitch!" Dean repeated, feigning annoyance, even though he wasn't. Well, not much anyway. But if Sam was going to be a damned cock tease, Dean would just have to be one right back. Knowing Sam was watching him, Dean picked up the sun block and squirted some more into his hands, rubbing the lotion into the one place Sam hadn't gotten to. His chest. His fingers running over his pecs, brushing over his own nipples, making sure to go slowly enough that it couldn't be mistaken for anything but a tease. His hand moving down over his stomach, his fingers dipping just into the waist band of his jeans, as he grinned at Sam. Then turned and picked up his rag, picking up where he left off waxing down his baby.

Sam gratefully sank onto the shaded porch swing, a soft chuckle coming from him at Dean's annoyed 'Bitch'. Damn that sun was hot and far too bright. He honestly couldn't wait for the gray days of winter even if it meant cold temperatures. Or at least the fall when he could wear long sleeved shirts.

Focusing on Dean he watched as Dean smeared lotion on his chest, slathering in his nipples, over muscles, making his muscles glimmer in the sun. Sam groaned, licking his lips at the thought of getting Dean back in that bedroom. He should have taken care of Dean's chest too he thought mournfully, but he really didn't think he could have behaved himself. It had been hard enough not to reach further into Dean's jeans are take hold of Dean's dick, running his lotion-slicked hand up and down giving Dean a hand job right then and there. God how that boy drove him utterly crazy. He hadn't been this horny in years. Dean was an addiction he couldn't get enough of, didn't want to get enough of. He hated that they were both still so messed up from the vampires that they couldn't truly enjoy each other the way they should be able to. Still, he reminded himself, if not for Vanessa, Dean wouldn't be part of his life. What irony. Everything he went through, it had been worth it if it meant Dean would stay with him. He would do it again for that precious gift. He wouldn't want Dean hurt again of course, but he supposed that too had contributed to the great need they had for each other.

He was glad when Dean finally decided he had teased Sam enough and turned back to his car. If he hadn't, Sam was going to end up reaching inside his own pants and taking care of the hard on he had. He watched as Dean put on a second show for him, rubbing down the car the way Sam wanted Dean to rub down his own body. Okay, so maybe he could end up jealous of a car.

Dean took his time. Made sure to do the job right. He owed his father that much. He’d promised to take care of the Impala when his dad had given the car to him on his sixteenth birthday. Dean certainly hadn’t “taken care” of it when he’d crashed it into a tree sloshed to the gills. He’d remade the promise again, one of many promises, standing next to his father’s grave.

Just like the grave next to it, his father’s grave was only a headstone. His father’s ashes scattered to the wind after he and Bobby had cremated him. His mother’s grave had no body either, neither was her spirit there, of course, but he thought his father would have still appreciated the gesture of having his name etched in stone next to his wife.

To take care of the Impala, to keep hunting and saving people, to find the thing that had killed his mom and make it pay, to keep in touch with Bobby, to make sure that his dad’s sacrifice wasn’t in vain, to make John proud… to name a few… Maybe some people would have thought some of those promises were unreasonable or foolish, but Dean had meant every one of them and he meant to keep them. Though he couldn’t help but wonder just exactly how many of those promises he’d made he’d been able to keep and how many he’d broken.

Dean shook his head sighing a little at the direction his thoughts had taken. This is what always happened when he had too much down time. He started thinking and his thoughts rarely ran to pleasant memories. At least they would be going after the vampires soon. That would give him something else to think about other than the past.

Finally finished Dean stood back and admired his baby with a fond smile. It had been definitely worth it to do the job right. She really was a thing of beauty.

Pleased with himself Dean opened the driver’s door, got in and listened to the last bit of the current song that was blaring over the speakers before popping out the tape and returning it carefully to the box. He shut off the car then, promising to finish detailing her inside as well soon before he got out of the car and locked up. Gathering up the supplies he’d used he finally walked to the porch. Laying the wet towels over the railing and dumping the remainder of the supplies back into the bucket that he’d rinsed out.

Then Dean all but fell into the porch swing next to Sam with a contented sigh, glad for the rest.

Sam watched Dean slowly, painstakingly wax his car. It was obvious that Dean's mind quickly drifted elsewhere, lost in memories as he tended the Impala. Sam really didn't mind not getting a second show. In some ways he enjoyed it more. He almost felt like he was spying in on a private moment, and he took the time to admire the man's grace and the slow ripple of muscle as young man worked. He slipped inside at one point and got more ice for the water and refilled his lemonade. The dishes were done and Jacob and Bobby were no where to be seen. A moment of panic ran through him. He didn't hear anyone inside the house. He strode to the back door and ripped it open, ready to yell for them but her heard their voices coming from the barn. He relaxed immediately though still took a moment to scent the air and make certain they were still alone. Satisfied, he returned to the porch swing, using his feet to move it ever so gently.

Sam had let his own mind wander after a fashion, focusing on smells and sounds and loosing himself in his surroundings. The citrusy car soap and the distinct bite of the wax drifted to him on the wind. He smelled the lingering scent of Bobby and Jacob, and could make out at least four different horses and a handful of cows. The flap of bird's wings momentary drew his eyes skyward and he saw a hawk snatch a sparrow out of the air and fly off with its catch to a nearby tree. The sounds of cicadas drifted in from the trees and the scrabble of squirrel claws on bark. Movement through the brush snapped his focus in that direction, but he identified almost immediately it was only a couple deer. The smell of Dean's sweat drew his eyes back to the man working lovingly on his car.

He poured a fresh glass of ice water for Dean when Dean finally headed up to the porch and settle beside him. He handed Dean the water, smiling at the man's happy sigh. He put his arm along the back of the swing. He knew Dean was hot from working so hard and he would let Dean settle against him if he wanted. The offer was there. With his free hand he refilled the glass of water and set the pitcher back on the small table next to the swing.

"She looks pretty," Sam said, admiring the car that shone in the sunlight. It seemed like its own type of beast, relaxed but ready to spring to life at her master's bidding.

Dean smiled gratefully at the offered glass of water, though he took his time drinking it this time. Relaxed and unhurried. He let his head lean back against Sam’s arm on the swing. The condensation from his glass dripped down the sides, landing on his bare stomach, but he didn’t bother to wipe it away. It felt nice. This felt nice. Just sitting here like this with Sam.

The young man gave the vampire a slight grin when Sam commented on his car before turning his own eyes back to her.

“Yeah.” He agreed immediately then sat there quietly beside Sam for a few minutes, only moving to take small sips from his glass. When he finally spoke, he was almost surprised by the words coming out of his mouth at first.

“She was my dad’s. He gave her to me when I turned sixteen. Best damned birthday present in the world. He loved that car. Used to say that he figured I was conceived in the back seat.” Dean made a slight face and chuckled. “Not that I ever really wanted those details.”

Dean didn’t talk about his father often, not even with Bobby. But somehow it seemed… ok… to talk about his dad with Sam.

“Wish you could have met him…” Dean added almost too softly to be heard, his voice trailing off a little at the end.

Sam reached across, lightly resting his hand on Dean's forearm. "He must have had great faith in you. Trusting a sixteen year old with such a prized treasure. I think if I had a son, he would be lucky to get a beat up jalopy from me when he was eighteen. My dad, he gave me his old wagon when I was seventeen, as a wedding present. And an old nag to pull it. That horse was a stupid shit but I thought she was great …okay, I still thought she was a stupid shit, but she was my stupid shit. I fawned over her like you over your car. I brushed her ragged coat, polished her worn hooves, combed her mane and tail. She looked pretty damned fine in my eyes. My wife scolded me for treating that horse better than I treated her. I told her that's because she could brush her own coat and polish her own hooves. I don't think I got any sex for a month," Sam said with a laugh. "I can say with some confidence that I wasn't conceived in the back of the wagon my dad gave me. Yeah, don't think I'd want details like that either.

He returned his gaze to Dean's car. "I can see why your dad loved that car. Bet there are a lot of fond memories of you and him in that car. Driving across the countryside, eating at diners, maybe seeing touristy traps upon occasion. I wish I could have met him too. You're going to have to tell me about him. Maybe show me a picture of him. Michael always told me so long as someone remembers you, you're not really dead. I always kind of liked that, sometimes makes it a little easier to think about people I've loved and lost."

Dean couldn’t help but smile when Sam said that his father must have had a lot of faith in him to give him the Impala when he was sixteen. The young man wasn’t all that certain just why his father had given him the car, especially knowing how much his Dad had loved it. It had been a shock to say the least when his father had thrown him the keys at the breakfast table that morning and had simply said, “She’s yours.” Dean had only been able to stare at his father, his jaw hanging open catching flies for a long time, before he smiled so big it was a wonder he hadn’t split his face apart. He didn’t think that smile left him for months afterwards.

Sometimes Dean wondered if the gift wasn’t a kind of make up for all the birthdays he’d had that hadn’t been celebrated like normal kids. When he’d been younger he’d often spent his birthdays either alone or with Bobby or one of his dad’s other friends who was taking care of him at the time. When he was old enough to finally go along with his father on hunts instead of being left behind, often they were both too busy to even think about something so trivial as a birthday until days or even weeks after it had passed.

Then again, it wasn’t as though the Impala hadn’t always been partially his for as long as he could remember. That car had been more of a home to him than any of the shacks or motels he’d stayed with his dad over the years. Though Bobby’s place and Pastor Jim’s home came close, somehow it just wasn’t the same. Maybe because during the times he stayed at their homes his Dad often wasn’t there and if his dad wasn’t there then it wasn’t home.

He’d helped his Dad take care of the car as soon as he was tall enough to look under the hood, he’d had a fake driver’s license for years before he could legally get one, that morning though, the keys in his hand, it had been official. The Impala was his. Dean had promised without any prompting to take care of her just as good as his father had, if not better.

Dean couldn’t help but smile and chuckle as Sam described how his father had given him a wagon for his wedding present. Trying to picture Sam fawning over some old horse like he babied his car had him biting the inside of his cheek in amusement. But even as he was trying to contain his snickering he couldn’t help but marvel for a moment what a different world Sam had lived in when he had been… human…

Dean’s grin slowly slid off his face, sobering as Sam talked about his wife… just one of the few Sam had loved through the years. Loved and lost… His family killed in front of him. How many wives had Sam had? How many had he lost? Sam had watched so many of those he loved die… one day Sam would watch him die too.

Yes, Dean had a lot of fond memories of his father. But every time he remembered the good times he couldn’t help remembering watching his Dad bleed out in his arms, guilt choking him till he could barely breathe. Dean could barely remember his mother, yet her loss still left a gaping hole in his heart. How had Sam endured the deaths of so many he’d loved? Sam was so much stronger than him. Dean wasn’t sure if he could go on. He almost hadn’t, when his father died.

“I don’t know how you do it…” Dean whispered softly.

Sam sensed the turmoil of changing emotions in the man beside him and understood it all too well.

"Sometimes, I don't know how I do either," Sam admitted. "Most vampires chose another vampire. We…we mate for life. Until that other person is dead, we don't wander, we don't leave them. Losing them is like your heart's been ripped out. It might be why I still grieve for my past loves at times. Or maybe it's just the human nature of loss and memory. Something triggers a memory about them and it all comes tumbling back. All of my loves died violently, died because of me in some fashion or another. Sometimes my memories of them are still tarnished by that memory of their bloodied bodies. The loss of Michael was probably the hardest because he was my first true love. That’s probably a terrible thing to say and doesn't mean my wife and kids dying didn't hurt but being blood mates, well, that changes everything. I think the hardest thing to get past is the guilt and the memory of their deaths. But my loved ones wouldn't want me dwelling on their deaths. They would want me celebrating the memories of the things we did together, the things that made us laugh, celebrating our love, remembering some of the kick-ass adrenaline pumping hunts we had," Sam smiled, briefly recalling some of those very things. "Sometimes it's still hard. It was really hard with Jessica because I never really knew what happened." Sam sighed. "I almost wish I didn't now. At least I'll get the bitch who killed her. Still, I much prefer recalling the memories of the fun times we had than when I found her dead." He glanced over at Dean. "Scares the hell out of me that you're a hunter, but at the same time I'm glad to know you can cover your own ass."

Sam took a long drink of his lemonade. "I wish like hell you would sit out this next hunt, but I'm guessing you're probably thinking the same thing about me. I'm not anxious to start hunting Vanessa down, but I want the job done. The sooner she's dead, the sooner you're safe, I'm safe, and our friends," he jerked his head toward the house behind them, "are safe."

Dean couldn’t say that Sam’s words were very comforting. It was difficult listening to Sam talk about his past love ones, hearing the pain in his voice. Knowing that Sam blamed himself… much like Dean blamed himself for his father’s death.

It made Dean feel really fucking guilty he’d brought it up in the first place. Especially when he remembered the vampire’s words to him back at the diner that had freaked Dean out so much. When Sam said he’d felt like he would die without him… it was even more worrisome now when Sam talked about how much Michael had meant to him, how much it had hurt Sam when he’d lost him, and Sam had said in the diner before… that Dean meant more to him than even Michael…

Dean didn’t know what to say and avoided meeting Sam’s eyes. It scared him, it really did, how much Sam seemed to need him. Love him. It scared him to think what Sam might do to try to protect him. It scared him to think what the vampire might do if he lost him. How much Dean felt for Sam… that scared him too.

God, how the hell had they gotten on this topic in the first place?

When Sam finally mentioned him sitting out this next hunt, Dean finally turned his head to look at the other man. Narrowing his eyes a little. Like hell he was going to sit this one out. He wasn’t going to fucking let Sam do this alone. The vampire was right about one thing though, the sooner that they killed that bitch and her nest the sooner their friends would be safe. He probably wouldn’t stop looking over his shoulder… or remembering how they’d used him… but it was a start.

Deciding he’d had enough of the dark direction their discussion had taken them, not wanting to think about the past, or the future for that matter, Dean decided to take matters into his own hands. Pushing himself up from the swing but only so he could turn around and straddle Sam’s lap. Without waiting for Sam to react or speak, Dean looped his arms around the vampire’s neck and kissed him hard. Now was all that mattered. Now was all he wanted to think about, and right now all he wanted was Sam’s hands and mouth on him making him squirm.

Sam was still a bit lost in thought, recalling Michael, recalling Lizzie, and of course Jessica. He missed them. Their absence was a gaping hole in his chest, but time had softened their loss. His first wife and children had sadly become a distant recollection. Stasi had told him as a vampire he would lose many of his human memories, or at least, the sharpness of them would fade. That he had gained vengeance for the death of each of his loves soothed the ache he sometimes felt. At least they rested peacefully. It wasn't particularly comforting to think that all their souls save Lizzie's was probably in Hell and he refused to dwell on that. He would eventually find out. A long time from now. He had lost friends to old age and wondered and hoped that that would be how Dean passed. After a long and full life at Sam's side. Would it be easier to watch Dean die of natural causes? A slight smile touched his lips. No, that wasn't how Dean would want to go out. He would want to die in the line of duty, giving himself over to death to save an innocent. Sam hoped that would be how he died too.

The sudden weight on his lap, the arms around his neck and the lips pressed hard against him completely derailed his train of thought. He moaned into Dean's mouth and caressed Dean's bare back. His cock was certainly beginning to realize all its earlier frustration was soon to be rewarded for its patience. He welcomed Dean's cool tongue into his mouth. The lingering chill of the ice water would soon be gone and he aggressively tangled his tongue with Dean's to ensure that very fact would happen. He felt his lust flare as he smelled the need and want coming from his blood mate. He couldn't have stopped his growl if he had to and slid one hand down to Dean's ass and pulled him closer.

Dean moaned into the vampire’s mouth when he felt Sam’s hands run down his bare back. Sam’s touch cool in comparison to Dean’s overheated skin and he shivered slightly. More in delight than any actual chill. His body had been aching for this. He’d made himself wait long enough to feel more than just Sam’s appreciative gaze caressing his skin.

His fingers tangled in Sam’s hair as he sucked on his lover’s tongue. The vampire’s needy growl vibrating through him and making him even harder, rubbing his thickening arousal against the other man’s stomach. Growling in return at the feel of Sam’s hand gripping his ass and pulling them even tighter together.

This was what he wanted, what he needed. He didn’t want to think. He didn’t want to remember. He just wanted to feel. He wanted to feel this. He wanted to feel more.

Breaking the kiss Dean panted against Sam’s lips. “Time to break in that new mattress.”

Dean's answering growl electrified him. The press of Dean's hardening cock against him drove his own arousal firmer. He didn't want Dean to break the kiss but reminded himself Dean needed oxygen, but surely they hadn't been kissing that long…?

The suggestion Dean made, yes he whole heartedly agreed but he didn't want to let Dean go, not even for a minute. The swing though, gave him no leverage to easily get to his feet carrying Dean. He wanted to suggest right here, right now, it was just fine, the mattress would still be there, but he didn't want to be outside and so exposed. He didn't want the man he loved to be so exposed.

"Yes," Sam panted, groaning in complaint when Dean shifted from his lap. Immediately he missed Dean's fingers in his hair, the warmth of the man's hot body pressed against him, the arms wrapped around his neck. Taking Dean's hand, he led inside and to their room. As soon as he shut the door he pulled Dean to him, recapturing the young man's mouth with his own. He slowly walked Dean backwards until they reached the bed and gently laid the man down, braking there kiss as he raked his gaze over Dean's gleaming body.

"You are so fucking beautiful," Sam murmured, running his hands over Dean's chest, over his rock hard abs, and along his hips.

Sam’s agreement seemed both eager and reluctant at the same time, and Dean couldn’t help but grin a little at the vampire’s groan of complaint when Dean forced himself up from Sam’s lap. He could certainly sympathize. He was instantly missing the feeling of Sam’s arms around him, the hard body beneath him, rubbing his cock against those rock hard abs… but he wanted to do this proper damn it. Sam deserved that much, and Dean certainly didn’t want to start getting all hot and heavy with his lover out here only to have Bobby or Jacob walk out on them.

If he didn’t die of embarrassment right away, Jacob’s taunts would certainly kill the mood faster than a bucket of ice water on his crotch.

So Dean let Sam take him by the hand… even if it was kind of girly… and lead them back to their room. Glad that they didn’t run into the two older men along the way, even though Dean had a feeling that Jacob and Bobby would know what they were up to soon enough. Neither he or Sam had been all that quiet after all the previous times they’d made love.

Dean went into Sam’s arms willingly when the door was pulled shut behind them, locking them away in their own world where it was just the two of them, nothing else. No distractions. No worries. Just them. He moaned into the other man’s mouth, letting himself be walked backwards and then laid down on the bed. Feeling his skin warm a little under Sam’s regard, and then all out flushing when the other man called him beautiful.

God damn it, Sam’s sappy girly comments really shouldn’t make him so fucking hot… but it did…

Dean grinned up at the other man, arching a little under the hands that ran over his chest and stomach then letting out a soft groan of complaint when Sam seemed content to just look. He wanted Sam to do a lot more than look damn it.

The young man reached down to unbutton his jeans and quickly lifted his hips to push them down as far as he could before kicking them the rest of the way off. His eyes never leaving Sam’s as he took his hardening cock in his hand and began stroking himself slowly.

“You better get your ass naked and on this bed before I start without you.”

Sam watched Dean unbutton his pants and he wet his lips. A small groan escaped him as Dean exposed himself, his cock thick and ready for attention. When Dean started stroking himself Sam thought he could come just watching him.

Dean's words startled him out of his transfixion and he laughed. He disrobed, grateful his cock was finally free of his jeans. Like Dean he kicked his clothes aside.

"Looks like you already have," Sam said as he crawled onto the bed beside Dean. "We can't have that, not when I'm here."

Taking Dean's hand off of his cock, he replaced it with his own, thumbing Dean's slit, then running his palm over the tip, spreading the precome around on his hand and beginning a slow stroke, matching the pace Dean had set. Leaning over Dean he licked a path up Dean's abs until he reached the young hunter's chest. He focused on the closest nipple, licking his tongue over it then swirling around it and sucking until he had worked it into a hard nib. He turned his mouth's focus to the other nipple while his hand played with the one he had just made so hard, pinching and twisting it.

Dean grinned at just how quickly Sam stripped himself down, his eyes unashamedly drinking in the sight of Sam’s naked body. Fuck, he’d never get tired of looking at Sam. If there was ever a perfect example of male beauty then it was Sam and anyone who disagreed needed a good smack upside their head. From his perfectly sculpted ass, six pack abs, muscled thighs, and of course his beautiful thick cock. Sometimes he still had difficulty believing that this was his, Sam was his, and that the other man wanted him just as much as Dean wanted Sam. That Sam thought he was… beautiful… when Dean thought the other man was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen…

Dean was grateful for the other man’s fingers wrapping around his needy flesh, cutting off the supremely chick flick thoughts going through his head. He moaned unashamedly in pleasure, his hips lifting off the bed a little, pushing himself into Sam’s fingers playing with him. God, it felt so fucking good. After all the teasing, all the waiting, just the feeling of Sam’s hand on his cock jacking him off felt amazing.

But it was a hundred times better when combined with the feeling of Sam’s lips and tongue moving up his stomach to his chest. Tongue toying with his nipples, Dean couldn’t help but groan in pleasure. Dean watched Sam, his fingers tangling in the other man’s hair, though he made sure not to tug or pull on the delicate strands. He didn’t want to remind Sam... of them…

The young man arched with a soft cry when Sam began pinching his oversensitive nipple while sucking on the other, his cock already beginning to leak from the over stimulation. If Sam wasn’t careful he was going to make him come before they even really got started. Dean wasn’t about to tell the other man to stop or slow down though, not when it felt this good.

“Fuck, Sam… yeah…”

Sam slid one leg between Dean's, rubbing his hard cock into the man's hip. He licked his way up to the notch between the young man's collar bone and flicked his tongue in and out of the depression. Sam eased Dean's legs further apart then, letting go of Dean's cock, he shifted so both legs were between Dean's. Pressing down so their cocks were caught between them, he rolled his hips occasionally, keeping up the slow paced stimulus. Leisurely he worked his way up to Dean's neck. Biting down with his human teeth and sucking as his tongued the tender flesh, a soft purr beginning deep in his chest.

He had never had the opportunity to explore the sensitivity of Dean's neck. Everyone had some spots particularly sensitive above and beyond the norm. Nipping and licking and sucking, Sam hunted for those spots as he caressed Dean's side, noting each reaction he got and mapping them out in his mind. He went to work on one particularly sensitive area, toying with it as readily as if it were Dean's cock: sucking, licking, tongue-fucking. Of course with Dean's neck he also got to bite. He kept his fangs sheathed. He wanted to focus on Dean the man rather than Dean his blood mate.

Running his hand further down Dean's side, he began to rub over the young man's hip and then slid his finger between his cheeks. He didn't delve far, only about half way down toward Dean's hole. He didn't want the man to panic, but he did want to try to start getting them both over some of the issues the vampires had given them. Sam desperately wanted good memories and good feelings associated with more intimate sex rather than the current nightmares that tormented his dreams. He wanted to replace Dean's terrible dreams with only thoughts of him, tender caresses, and loving kisses.

Dean sighed softly, and he wasn’t sure whether he felt more relief or regret when Sam’s determined “attack” on his nipples ended. Though he certainly couldn’t complain too much when Sam’s mouth continued upwards over his collar and neck, the other man’s lips and tongue determined to find out every sensitive spot. He moaned and tilted his head back, arching his neck to give Sam even better access.

He definitely moaned in complaint when Sam’s hand left his cock however he shifted his legs apart without complaint to allow his lover between them. Groaning again, this time in approval and pleasure when he felt Sam’s cock rubbing against his own, thick, hard, and so damned hot. Perfect…

He smiled when he heard and felt Sam begin to purr. The slow easy rubbing, Sam rolling his hips, and the gentle biting and sucking on his neck so damned arousing and so damned soothing at the same time.

Dean bent his knees, arching up against Sam. His fingers combing though Sam’s hair, moving down his shoulders and back, exploring the flexing muscles, pulling his lover closer. He felt Sam’s hand move lower, sliding over his ass, his fingers delving a little between his cheeks.

Though he tensed a little at first, he forced himself to relax. He didn’t ask Sam to stop. He didn’t want Sam to stop. He moved his hands down to Sam’s ass, gently squeezing. Encouraging. This was the room where Sam had made love to him for the first time. Only the second time Dean had ever been taken by a man, the first time willingly. This was where Sam had helped him forget anyone else’s touch but his.

He wanted that again…

The tension that came into Dean was obvious to the vampire, as was the slight jump in the young man's heart beat. Sam was more than prepared to stop the invasion between Dean's cheeks but then Dean relaxed again. He loved the way Dean arched against him, the way his hands roamed over his back and held him so close. He groaned into Dean's neck when the young man's fingers kneaded his ass. Was that a sign he should continue deeper? He decided to take that as such, especially since Dean had relaxed again, at least as relaxed as he could get considering the way Sam was working at the newest spot he found that Dean seemed to like.

He slowly slipped his finger deeper, rubbing tenderly, inching his way closer to Dean's hole. Finally he felt the puckered flesh under his touch and purred louder. He played his finger around the hole, rubbing at it, pressing rhythmically against it, matching his slow grind against Dean's hard cock. After toying with the hole for a few minutes he pressed his finger just barely in, but not threatening to breach the tight ring of muscle. As before, he pressed in and out to the rhythm of his sucking and grinding, moaning at the feel of the heat and the thought of Dean's velvet insides wrapped around his cock.

Moving from Dean's neck, he covered Dean's mouth with his own, invading with his tongue. As he investigated Dean's mouth, he continued his gentle touches, moving his finger up the crack some to give Dean a break from the stimulus. He didn't want to push Dean too far too fast. He decided he was going to try to get Dean to let him taste him and tongue his hole. That would be a good start. From there he could move up to Dean's balls and cock, maybe rubbing at Dean's hole while he purred around Dean's cock, giving a little positive reinforcement. He would just go slowly and take cues from Dean as to what Dean was ready for and what he wasn't.

Dean forced himself not to tense again when he felt Sam’s fingers moving deeper between his ass cheeks. Closer to his hole. Trying not to think about how close those fingers were to where he’d been violated. Doing his best to concentrate instead on the feeling of Sam’s mouth sucking bruises into his skin along his neck and the hot hard dick rubbing alongside his, leaving hot trails of moisture across both their stomachs. More or less ignoring the finger circling around his opening, and then finally touching it… playing…

In the back of his mind he knew that this wasn’t the way to do this. He should be enjoying Sam’s touch and not trying to ignore it because it was the only way he could endure it. But he simply didn’t trust himself. He didn’t trust his own reactions. If he thought about it, and freaked out…

It was easier to ignore it, and the memories along with it. It didn’t really matter if he enjoyed that, because he was more than enjoying what else Sam was doing to him. And Sam enjoyed it, he could tell by the way the vampire’s purr deepened, vibrating through his chest, and Dean chuckled a little. It was like he was having sex with a big cat…

The young man’s laugh immediately changed to a moan when Sam covered his lips with his own. Dean parted his lips, allowing Sam’s tongue to explore his mouth, and he stroked it with his own, sucking on it with enthusiasm.

Relaxing completely once Sam’s fingers moved away from his hole again, and Dean felt a flash of guilt knowing that the other man would probably feel the difference, but he hoped the other man wouldn’t call him on it. Dean wanted this. He did. He wanted Sam, and he wanted to give Sam whatever he wanted. Of course he remembered how good Sam had made him feel the first time, he just had to remember that and not…

It was crystal clear Dean wanted to make love to Sam. It was also crystal clear Dean wasn't ready to be touched down there yet, even though he could tell a part of Dean did. He could smell the hint of fear on his lover. He knew it had nothing to do with him. Dean had absolutely no fear of Sam. It was the memories, still too fresh, still too painful. He broke their kiss and looked down lovingly at Dean.

"I know you're scared of what you'll remember. I'm scared of what you'll remember. I'm scared of what I'll remember, too."

He kissed Dean again running his hand along Dean's side and hip, caressing, trying to soothe him.

"We could make love as blood mates if you would like. Fears melt away when the blood boils, but I'm in no rush, we've years ahead of us. If you never want to be taken in such a way, even by me, ever again, that's okay. It really is enough to have you at my side, to kiss you, to make you come and hear you shout my name. I'm not saying that because I think that’s what you need to hear or to make you feel guilty or feel better about your choices. I'm simply telling you the truth. So long as you're in my arms, I'm happy, Dean. So long as your heart is mine, what else matters?"

Running his hand up Dean's chest he teased Dean's nipple with his fingers then planted light kisses on Dean's face, his cheeks, his jaw. He licked up to Dean's ear and played his tongue inside, tickling, then licked and kissed and nibbled his way back to Dean's lips.

"Why don't you try touching me the way I was touching you?" He smiled, a little embarrassed, "But no making fun of me if I freak, okay?"

He should have figured out by now that there was no way he could hide anything from his vampire lover. When Sam broke their kiss Dean was panting more than a little and his cock was dripping precome heavily across both their stomachs, making it hard for him to think. But not so difficult that he didn’t just have to look in Sam’s eyes, even before the other man started speaking, and know that Sam knew.

God damn it.

Dean wasn’t sure why it bothered him so much that Sam could read him like an open book. Maybe “bother” was the wrong word. Because really? It relieved him that he didn’t have to tell Sam he was uncomfortable. Sam just knew and stopped. But he hadn’t wanted Sam to know. A part of him hadn’t even wanted Sam to stop. Dean was sure he could have pushed through his discomfort… as long as Sam didn’t know about it. Now though?

Yeah, he was scared and he hated it. He didn’t want this fear inside of him anymore than he had wanted what those vampires had done to him. He felt just as helpless by that fear as he had when they’d been holding him down, using him, and he’d been unable to fight them off. He didn’t know how to fight off this fear.

When Sam mentioned them making love as blood mates, Dean came to the sinking realization that he hadn’t even overcome the fear from all those years ago. The first time he’d let Sam make love to him… the blood… Sam was right, the fear had simply melted away. It was only because of the blood he’d let Sam inside of him. Realizing that he might never be able to let Sam make love to him without the blood was a crushing blow he hadn’t been expecting.

Even as Sam tried to reassure him that it didn’t matter, that the other man was happy just to have him in his arms, Dean couldn’t help the anger he felt. Not at Sam, but at himself. He felt like he was cheating Sam out of something even as the other man reassured him he wasn’t. If Dean’s arousal had faded a bit before it was practically nonexistent right now, and there certainly was no way to hide that from Sam.

Even as Sam continued to kiss him and touch him gently, making ripples of pleasure travel all through his body, Dean felt close to tears and of course that only made him more angry and ashamed. Even as Sam offered to let him touch Sam the way Sam had been touching him, trying to make light and joke about his own possible freaking out. Dean closed his eyes tight. Refusing to let the angry tears escape no matter how much they wanted to.

With a sickening realization he knew he just couldn’t do this now. Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t stop thinking about how fucked up he was now. Everything had started out fine, perfect even, and he’d ruined it. Just as he’d feared he would.

“I can’t…” He barely managed, his voice catching in his throat like broken glass. Ashamed, he started trying to push at Sam’s shoulders where before he’d been clinging to the other man. Trying to get Sam to let him up. He just couldn’t stand those kind too understanding eyes looking down at him any longer.

"No," Sam said emphatically, refusing to let Dean push him off. "Stop it, Dean. I can be happy with you being in my arms, with a relationship like I described. I can't be happy with you running from it for the reasons you're running. I'm not going to let you throw it all away, throw us away, because you're afraid you might panic. Afraid you might embarrass yourself. Afraid you'll be too afraid. You're in my arms. You're safe with me. You panic, you freak, hell, you flail and lash out at me, it's okay. We can and we will get through this. Do you really think I'm not scared and worried I'm going to have flashbacks? I am. I'm scared as hell I will just freak and not be able to deal with any of it. But I refuse to let that bitch win. I will not let her ruin me. I will not let her ruin you."

Sam took one of his hands and interlaced his fingers with Dean's. "I don't like being scared. I don't want to think about them. I don't want to dream about them. I want my dreams to be filled with you. I want remembered touches to be your touches. I want your scent, your feel, to be the only thing in my memories. I'm desperate to get them out of my head and I want to get lost in you. I want you to get lost in me."

Looking down at the man he loved, he bared his fangs, eyeing Dean's throat. His voice came out almost a growl. "Let me make love to you. Let me wash away their memories. Trust me."

Sam wasn’t letting him up. Sam wasn’t letting him go, no matter how hard Dean began to struggle. It was like shoving against an immovable brick wall, and the young man was very close to having a full blown panic attack. His breath was coming in short quick pants, and his heart was beating so hard against his ribs it hurt.

He wasn’t trying to run away! He wasn’t trying to throw them away! Really, he wasn’t, he… just needed a few minutes. Just a few fucking minutes to get his head back on straight.

Dean looked up at Sam with wide, pleading, eyes, but the other man still refused to move. Holding him pinned against the bed, and even though Sam wasn’t hurting him, Dean still felt trapped. Helpless… He knew he was safe, he knew it was only Sam with him, but…

Yes, he was ashamed by his reaction… embarrassed… scared… and he hated it. It wasn’t all right. He didn’t want Sam to see him like this. It wasn’t all right…

Ruin him… Dean felt a hot wet tear escape the corner of his eye and there was nothing he could do to stop it. Didn’t Sam understand? Dean had been ruined long before they’d ever met. What that vampire bitch had done to him… to them… was just the icing on the cake. He was always damaged goods, and he didn’t know if he… he wanted what Sam was offering. He wanted to give Sam everything he wanted. So they could both forget everything but each other…

But it was only the blood that made that happen. Not him…

Dean looked down at their twined fingers and swallowed hard, before his eyes met Sam’s once more. Did it matter? If the only way he could do this, give Sam what he wanted, was by exchanging blood? Yeah, it mattered… Dean wanted it to be him, not the blood, but if this was the only way…

Nodding shakily, Dean turned his head, baring his throat.

Sam hated every minute of holding him there, of watching the terror creep into Dean's eyes. He hated seeing the desire Dean had to run, to escape, not to face this and Sam almost caved when he saw the tear slide down the side of Dean's face. He could read the physical signals Dean's body gave off but he didn't have a clue what was going on in that beautiful head. He could see the reluctance in Dean. He exposed his throat to Sam but Sam could see that wasn't really what Dean wanted. He also knew how Dean would taste. Fear and shame and sadness. That wasn't what he wanted to taste. He wanted to taste joy and love and trust.

Sam leaned in close. "I'll taste you soon," he purred.

Taking his time he began licking and nibbling at Dean's throat, going for all those sensitive spots he had found before. He ran his fingers through Dean's hair, along the back of his neck while the other hand roamed slowly over Dean's body. He nipped his way down Dean's arm until he reached his hand. He spent some time sucking on each digit and running the tip of his tongue over the center of Dean's palm. He moved back up to Dean's chest and investigated every little dip every little scar with his tongue and lips, sometimes nipping, sometimes sucking. He continued to caress Dean's body with his hands, massaging sometimes, other times just enjoying the feel of Dean's skin under his touch.

Dean felt himself tensing when Sam leaned in close, bringing his mouth to his neck. He’d never been afraid of this before, and he wasn’t really afraid now, but at the same time he was. He wasn’t afraid of Sam, he knew Sam would never hurt him. He was afraid of himself, of all the other demons churning around inside of his head ready to strike. The memories of what the vampires had done to him almost the least of his fears right now.

The shame he felt, of knowing he might not be able to give Sam what he wanted, despite how Sam said he already had everything he wanted, was worse. He’d first been… attacked… when he was seventeen. Seventeen. And he still wasn’t over it, not without the blood. How would he ever be over what the vampires had done to him? Fucking him one after another and another, making him scream and beg…

How was he ever going to let Sam make love to him? Sam said it was fine, but would it still be fine in a year? Five years? Ten years?

Dean tried to prepare himself for Sam’s bite. A part of himself craved it, of having all the fears and doubts just wash away, and Dean hated himself just a little more. For needing it to be this way, of not being able to give Sam what he wanted without it. Sam might as well drug him up with Rohypnol beforehand…

But Sam didn’t bite him. He just started nuzzling against his neck, licking and sucking lightly on his skin, searching out all the sensitive places he’d already mapped out. Running his fingers through his hair, petting him… Almost picking up where he left off as though Dean had never started freaking out in the first place. Not knowing what else to do, Dean simply closed his eyes and tried not to think at all. Thinking too much was what had gotten him to this point, after all. So he tried to just feel instead.

Concentrating on how warm Sam’s callused fingers felt on his skin, how good the other man’s lips and tongue felt exploring his body. His muscles began to slowly unknot themselves under Sam’s caresses. His head falling back into Sam’s palm with a sigh. His breath hitching and his eyes fluttering open, watching as Sam licked and sucked wetly on his fingers. The sucking somehow seeming to go straight to his cock that began to stir again.

Dean honestly didn’t know whether to be aroused or just melt into a relaxed puddle beneath Sam’s hands. He moaned and arched beneath Sam’s mouth as the other man moved over his chest, his fingers finding their way into his lover’s hair once more.

Sam sighed at feeling Dean's touch return. He let himself get lost in the taste and feel of his lover. He wanted to explore Dean's back as he had his chest and resituating himself he nudged Dean onto his stomach. Straddling Dean, he leaned over and returned to Dean's neck, sucking and biting, but only with his human teeth. He worked a hickey onto the side of the man's neck, then licked his way to the other side of Dean's neck, feeling a small shudder of pleasure from Dean's as he paused and nuzzled the nape of his neck. He bit harder on this side, then licked to soothe it before biting again, again with just his human teeth.

He really hadn't had a chance to thoroughly investigate Dean's back before and there were places on the back just perfect for hickies. As he worked on Dean's back with his mouth, he reached around and toyed with Dean's nipples. He grinned at the way Dean was moving beneath him, definitely enjoying what Sam was doing. Sam finally had to move his hands to Dean's stomach as he scooted down and off Dean. As with Dean's back, he investigated the cheeks of the young man's ass, tickling at the dimples he found there with his tongue. He steered clear of the crack between the cheeks and instead continued down Dean's body, nipping the sensitive backs of Dean's thighs, the backside of his knees, his ankles and even his toes, sucking on them as he had Dean's fingers. Finally pleased, he got Dean to roll back over and slunk up Dean's front side, rubbing his hard dick against Dean's flesh as he did.

When he felt the warmth inside him of his love and his contentment at its peak, he nicked his thumb with a fang. Dean needed to understand Sam didn't have to have anything more. Certainly he would like more, but he didn't have to have more. He squeezed a drop of his blood into Dean's mouth. It wasn't meant to arouse or excite. He simply wanted Dean to taste and understand.

Dean looked up at Sam curiously when the other man stopped kissing him and pulled back. Sam didn’t need words to tell him what he wanted, but Dean wasn’t so sure it was a good idea. Considering the way he’d just been close to having a full blown panic attack and he was just starting to calm down again… he didn’t know what he might do if he couldn’t see Sam. But Sam had asked him to trust him, he owed the other man that much, so he merely nodded and rolled over onto his stomach at Sam’s urging.

He felt Sam straddle him, Sam’s lips return to kissing and nuzzling his neck, and Dean sighed and relaxed under his lover’s weight. It was a lot like when Sam had given him that massage the first time, only a thousand times more intimate. He’d trusted Sam then, to take away the pain… certainly he could trust Sam now.

Dean groaned softly when he felt Sam’s teeth against his neck, felt the pressure and sucking on the side of his throat increase and he knew that the other man was marking him. Again. Rather than being irritated by the fresh ring of hickeys that the other man was leaving on his flesh, Dean felt even more comforted by the marks. Proof that he was Sam’s, only Sam’s, and that anyone who looked at him would know he was already taken.

Every time he felt Sam bite down on his neck he expected to feel sharper teeth piercing his skin, but it never came. He kept anticipating the eventual bite, and that anticipation, never knowing when Sam was going to finally pierce his skin, taste his blood, was arousing all on its own. Dean groaned and arched beneath the other man, his fingers tangling in the sheets beneath him when Sam began playing with his nipples while he continued to kiss and explore the length of his back.

“Fuck, Sam…” Dean panted as he started to rub his hardening dick against the cool sheets beneath him. Sam’s careful attentions working him back up to the state of arousal he’d been in before… he’d started to freak on the other man… But when he felt Sam shift lower, his mouth moving down over the curve of his ass, Dean tensed again in spite of himself. Afraid it was going to start all over again, but Sam didn’t move any closer to the place where Sam had touched him before. What had started the whole mess of doubts and fears inside of him, and Dean relaxed again with a sigh. Trusting Sam…

Dean’s knee jerked, ticklish, when the other man licked there and the young man lifted his head with a laugh to watch what Sam was doing. He was shocked when Sam continued down over his feet, and actually started sucking on his toes.

“You gotta be kidding me.” Dean laughed again, but at least he managed not to kick Sam in the face or anything due to the strange sensations. He was still grinning by the time Sam finished and crawled back up over him and Dean rolled once more onto his back. Moaning at the feeling of Sam’s hard cock rubbing against his own, and he watched as Sam finally bit into his finger. The scarlet drop forming on Sam’s thumb held his attention and he opened his mouth obediently for it.

He thought knew what to expect now from the taste of Sam’s blood and he was prepared for it. He was prepared for the intense, burning, arousal and need that would wash everything else away. Every fear, every doubt, disappearing like sandcastles before the incoming tide. A part of him wanted that, so very badly. He wanted to be able to give Sam what he wanted. But… it was different this time. Rather than fire there was only warmth that washed through him. Like he was wrapped in a warm blanket made entirely out of… joy… contentment… love… There was arousal too, but it was overshadowed by those other emotions, and Dean could only stare up at Sam a little dumfounded. Awed and not entirely understanding…

"I could explain the chemistry of blood, of how the hormones and endorphins and all of that flavor the blood to one sensitive to it. Simply put, Dean, the blood will always tell you how someone feels." He licked his thumb clean of the fresh bubble of blood. "Do you understand now, believe me now? I love you. I am happy to take whatever you want and feel comfortable giving. I don't need any thing more than your love in return." He combed his hand through Dean's hair. "Jessica and I were married six months after I had rescued her. Even so, it was three years before those vows were ever consummated. It could have been thirty. It could have been never. I loved her for her. Not for her…feminine plumbing," Sam said, flushing slightly.

Sam began kissing his chest again, talking between kisses and sucking and biting. "Mind you, we had great sex before that, just like you and I have had." He worked on Dean's left nipple. "Just the final act, it took three years for her to get through what she needed to get through." He moved to the right nipple. "Of course I wanted it sooner. Of course she wanted it sooner." He licked up to Dean's collar bone. "We would test, we would try, she would have her little panic attacks, and it got to the point we practically just burst into laughter, because when she would have her panic attacks, oh the things I would do to her." Sam drug his nails slowly down Dean's sides as he sucked a deep dark mark into Dean's skin above his nipple, then moved down to the base of his sternum. "Sometimes I suspected she exaggerated the attacks just to get me to tease and taunt her. Then one time, it just happened." Sam lifted his head and met Dean's eyes. "Just like that. It might never have if we hadn't tested, hadn't tried a dozen dozen times before that." Sam slid a little lower to where their shared precome coated Dean's abdomen. He lapped at it, moaning softly at the taste of the mixed semen. "It's worse for us because we've got your panic attack and my panic attacks to deal with." He chuckled a little. "So maybe if we shoot for five years, we can call us coming out ahead, huh?"

Without any real warning to Dean but a sly evil look coming into his eyes, he slid further down and suddenly took Dean's erection all the way into his mouth, deep throating him. Slowly he pulled off, sucking hard enough his cheeks hollowed as he purred.

At first Dean was still too stunned by the idea of actually being able to taste Sam’s emotions to really understand what the other man was saying. But he nodded as Sam explained, smiling and blushing up at the other man. Probably looking like a lovesick teenage girl, but he didn’t really care right now.

Yeah, he understood and he believed Sam.

Dean’s fingers tangled in Sam’s hair again, moaning as Sam started working on his nipples. He wondered if it was really awful for him to feel jealous of a woman who Sam had loved before he was even born. Still, listening to Sam talk relaxed him and had him smiling a little down at the other man. He ran his fingers through Sam’s hair and down over his neck and shoulders, almost massaging. His breath hitched in his throat as he watched Sam licking his stomach clean of their shared seed.

“Alright… but if you ever freak out and squeal like a little girl or something, I’m teasing you forever…” Dean teased, grinning down at Sam. Before he bucked underneath the other man with a curse when his cock was suddenly engulfed entirely in Sam’s hot wet mouth. The sudden purring sending ripples of pleasure through his whole body, and Dean moaned loud and unrestrained. “Oh fuck… yeah…”

Sam would have retorted he would never scream like a girl, but his mouth was otherwise occupied. He started humming "Lollipop, Lollipop" as he went back down on Dean playing with the crown, tonguing the slit, and licking up the shaft, returning to sucking on Dean's tip just as if it were a lollipop. He slid his arms under Dean's thighs, spreading him wider.

Moving down to Dean's sack he sucked gently, playing his tongue along its surface, then dove his tongue underneath it and worked his way back around to Dean's rock hard shaft. Kneading Dean's cheeks, he slowly spread the cheeks wider. After sucking on Dean's cock he returned his attention to Dean's balls, this time sucking one all the way into his mouth. He licked and toyed with him, purring again. He tongue slipped under Dean's sac again, this time a little further down, closer to Dean's hole, before returning to the man's balls and sucking in the one he had yet to pay attention to. He returned to the heavily weeping shaft and licked away the droplets with delighted groans.

When he began working his way down again he curled his fingers around the man's hard cock, running his palm over Dean's dripping member, slicking his hand before beginning to a slow steady stroke. He knew the vampires hadn't bothered to lick around his hole, they were only interested in their own pleasure. Fingering him, yes, licking, no, not unless they were licking away come and blood. He decided to take the chance. If it blew up in his face, well, he would make it up to Dean. He licked his way down to Dean's hole, running his tongue around its rim, moaning in pleasure, his purr kicking up a notch. He continue to jack Dean off as he probed a little deeper, flicking his tongue in and out but never pushing past the tight sphincter. Trying to keep Dean from freaking he quickly switched his attention to the young man's inner thigh and began licking and sucking, making it perfect clear he intended to bite Dean there. That pleasure, he knew, should help eradicate any fear or tension he had brought to Dean with his boldness.

Dean couldn’t stop himself from laughing loudly and playfully smacking the vampire on the back of the head when Sam began to hum that stupid ass song while the other man was sucking on his cock. And really, it was just wrong on so many levels how good that humming really felt when Sam took him deep in his mouth. But he certainly wasn’t about to admit it.

“God damn… Sammy…” Dean groaned, arching beneath his lover as Sam continued to play with his cock and balls. Sam’s mouth and tongue seemed to be everywhere at once. Seeking out every sensitive place that was sure to make him squirm and moan helplessly beneath him. Feeling those strong fingers kneading his ass and spreading him wider made him a little nervous but he trusted Sam. Sam knew he wasn’t ready to be penetrated there. But he’d try… for Sam, he’d try…

Dean’s fingers found themselves tangled in his lover’s hair again when Sam’s slick palm curled around his shaft, stroking him, and pulling deep groans of pleasure from his throat. And even though Sam’s tongue had been working closer and closer to his hole Dean was still a little surprised when he felt the first swipe of that slick hot muscle across his puckered opening and he gasped.

“Oh fuck! Sam…” He whispered, his eyes opening wide in surprise as he looked down at Sam. He’d never had anyone… It was strange, he wasn’t entirely sure what to feel, but fuck it felt good… Dean actually heard himself whimper in disappointment when that talented tongue left him, but when he felt the hard sucking on his inner thigh, he knew what came next. His fingers tightened in Sam’s hair in anticipation. “Oh yeah, do it…”

Sam was unsure about the sound Dean made when his tongue left his hole. Was it that he enjoyed it or didn't? There wasn't the stiffening tension, but Dean's arousal was pretty much all he could smell or feel anyhow.

At Dean's encouragement, he buried his teeth deeply in the young man's thigh, having to hold him firmly still. Dean's blood was pure fire inside him and he growled his pleasure as he pulled Dean's leg up tight against his lips, sucking hard on the flesh, though his buried teeth kept very little blood from actually reaching his mouth. What did was pure heaven. He tightened his bite and moaned at the erotic feelings the pressure on his fangs gave him. He worked on Dean's cock with his hand as his mouth and tongue and teeth worked on Dean's thigh. His need for Dean grew stronger. He wanted to keep tasting Dean's blood. He wanted to cover Dean's mouth with his own. HE wanted to tongue fuck the man's hole, he wanted Dean's cock fucking into his mouth or into him. He wanted it all.

He extracted his teeth and drank in the blood, slowly licking the wound closed. Looking up at Dean, seeing his firm erection with the come dripping generously down its sides as his hand glistened with it, he stared past it and into those green eyes with lust. Spreading Dean's legs a little wider, he licked away a few errant trails of crimson then, releasing the young hunter's shaft, he spread apart Dean's cheeks and rolled his tongue around that sweet tight hole.

Dean hissed through his teeth at the feeling of Sam’s fangs piercing through his flesh and burying deep into the muscle of his inner thigh. Throwing his head back and moaning in pleasure as the pressure and sucking increased and Sam’s fingers worked harder on his already leaking shaft. He felt Sam’s growl and his fingers tightened in Sam’s hair, before he forced himself to loosen his hold. He’d already nearly ruined this between them once, he certainly didn’t want to again by making Sam flashback.

He was glad that Sam held him so firmly because Dean wasn’t sure he’d be able to keep from bucking up against the vampire’s mouth. Probably ripping the wound on his thigh wider than was safe in the process, but Dean wasn’t sure if he would have cared if that happened. Looking down at Sam, seeing his lips stained blood red, seeing the rapture on his lover’s face and knowing he was the reason nearly left him breathless with pleasure.

“God, Sam…” Dean panted, trembling with desire, his fingers carded through the other man’s sweat mussed hair. His breath coming faster and his heart beating harder against his ribs seeing the almost feral possessive look in Sam’s eyes as the vampire looked up at him. Watching him lick away the blood that had dripped along his thigh somehow one of the most erotic things he’d ever seen.

When Sam spread him open wider, he felt his skin flush even hotter if it was possible. Knowing that Sam was seeing everything he had to offer but instead of feeling embarrassed all he felt was love and the desire to be possessed. Hooking his legs over Sam’s shoulders, he let Sam position him however he wished, and practically shouted in pleasure when he felt Sam’s tongue once more lapping at his sensitive hole. Dean lifted his hips and tugged on the back of his lover’s head, begging for more, he was so damned close.

“Oh fuck, Sammy… I’m gonna…” Dean whimpered and then his whole body shuddered as his orgasm ripped through him, his seed spilling hotly across his stomach and Sam’s fingers.

Dean's response to Sam's tongue was more than he could have hoped for and he probed deeper, in and out, in and out, mimicking what he wanted his dick to be doing, pacing it with the hand on Dean's shaft. He felt the tension fill the young man, but this was not the tension of fright but rather than of readying release. Sam grinned when he heard Dean's words and felt the man come. He wasted no time in shifting his attention from Dean's hole to his shaft, sucking and milking every thing he could from the man. Working him to come with a second orgasm. He purred in delight when it took next to nothing to get a second spurt of come, this time straight down his throat. He sucked Dean down gently then, running his hands through the cooling come on the tight stomach muscles of his lover.

When the cock in his mouth finally went flaccid, Sam began to lap at the smeared come, working his way up Dean's body. He still hadn't come. He wanted Dean to bring him off. He pressed his steely erection into Dean as he reached Dean's mouth and covered it with his own. Slipping his tongue inside, he claimed Dean's mouth as readily as his roaming hands claimed Dean's body. He moaned and purred, an occasional growl accompanying the purr. He rolled them over so he was beneath and thrust up against Dean's stomach.

Sam’s efforts were making him come completely undone. The only thing he could think, could feel, was how good Sam was making him feel. Nothing else seemed to matter. When the slick wet muscle probed deeper into him, pushing in and out of his hole, it felt so good Dean instinctively tried to relax to allow it even deeper. The unexpected pleasure of it rippling through his whole body in waves, leaving him shuddering and gasping Sam’s name over and over.

He heard himself groan in disappointment when that tongue left him again, but it was short lived, because suddenly Sam’s mouth was back on his cock. Swallowing him down and working him hard even as he was coming. Dean felt a second wave of pleasure slam into him hard enough that his back arched and he had to bite his lip hard to keep from simply screaming Sam’s name. His seed shooting hard down his lover’s throat, and he moaned incoherently in pleasure.

Dean would have sworn he saw stars at that point behind his closed eyes. Though he certainly wasn’t going to be admitting anything that girly out loud.

Sam brought him down slowly, which he was grateful for. Though he was still gasping and shivering with every ripple of pleasure that ran through him thanks to the gentle sucking on his cock, the other man seeming intent to suck him dry. Dean arched up into the fingers that ran over his slick stomach. Looking down and watching as Sam licked up the come he’d spilled off of his stomach and even though he’d already come hard the sight alone was enough to make him feel another rush of warmth pass through him.

“So fucking hot…” Dean whispered as he watched Sam, running his fingers tenderly through Sam’s hair. When his lover finally worked his way up back to his mouth, Dean’s lips parted eagerly and he moaned at the taste of his come and blood mixed together in Sam’s mouth. Sam’s cock like a hot heavy brand against his stomach, and he eagerly rubbed against it, his hands sliding down his lover’s back to Sam’s buttocks. Pulling Sam even closer.

Though Dean wasn’t all that prepared for the sudden reversal of their positions, and he had to break their kiss with a startled laugh as he regained his balance, he certainly wasn’t about to complain. Steadying himself with his arms on either side of Sam’s head as he pressed down and rolled his hips against Sam’s. Fuck, Sam was so hard he could feel the other man’s pulse through his cock trapped firmly between their stomachs.

Dean leaned in to kiss Sam hard, nipping lightly at his lover’s lips and thrusting his tongue deep, twining their tongues together. His hands moving to Sam’s chest, his fingers toying with Sam’s nipples. Pinching and rolling them between his fingers giving Sam back some of the pleasure that the other man had given him.

When he finally broke their kiss, more for the need to breathe than any desire to end it, Dean began working his way down Sam’s chin and neck. One of his hands reaching between them to grasp Sam’s cock as he bit down hard on the vampire’s neck. Also returning the favor of giving his lover the mother of all hickeys as he slowly started to jack him off in time with sucking a deep bruise into Sam’s skin.

Dean's kiss had him moaning and he growled in pleasure when the young man began to toy with his nipples. He felt the precome dripping heavily from his shaft and he arched up against Dean. The love nips at his lips made him nip back. He groaned in soft complaint when their kiss broke, but then Dean began to kiss his way down to Sam's neck. Dean's hard bite into his neck evoked a loud groan and he bucked up against Dean. When that warm hand curled around his cock, he threw back his head, exposing his neck fully.

"Oh, Jesus," Sam moaned. "Damn that feels so fucking good," he panted. The synchronized sucking of Dean's mouth at his throat and the hand that slid up and down his shaft made his heart race. He fucked into that hand, moaning his lover's name like a soft chant, lost to everything except for Dean's touch. This was so damned perfect. The feel of Dean's blunt teeth more exciting that the sharp teeth of a vampire's at his throat and somehow it deepened the pleasure, knowing that he would not feel needle sharp teeth penetrating his skin. It was as if it was an eternal tease, sensations being drawn out and keeping him on the razor sharp edge of pleasure of pain. That firm hand that slid up and down his come-slicked cock heightened his arousal. He fucked harder into that hand as Dean sucked harder at his neck. His fangs became exposed as he purred, an underlying growl reverberating in his chest as his heart pounded so hard it felt as if it might break free.

He was utterly and completely lost and reveled in being at Dean's mercy. He wrapped his fingers in Dean's hair as his other hand drew tight against the muscular back. He fucked harder and faster and couldn't have stopped now even had he wanted to.

"Yes, god, yes," Sam breathed. "Harder," he begged as he snapped his hips again and again. His hand dropped to Dean's ass and when Dean suddenly bit hard into his skin he cried out loudly and arched against that sweat and come soaked body as his balls drew up and the come spewed from him in powerful spurts.

He made no effort to hold back the cries of his lover's name as he shuddered with each thrust, waves of pleasure practically drowning him.

God, the sounds Sam was making. The growls. The purrs. The deep moans, some of which were his name and some just unrestrained sounds of pleasure were making Dean so hot that if Sam hadn’t already made him come, he probably could have come from them alone. He loved how Sam bucked beneath him, fucking into his fist faster. The vibrating purrs in Sam’s chest making Dean moan as well as he sucked harder, bit harder, on Sam’s neck. Before Sam he never would have thought what a fucking turn on it could be to bite, to mark, the one he loved so everyone would know that Sam was his, damn it, and no one else’s.

When Sam begged for more, asked for harder, Dean gave it to him without question. At this point in time he didn’t think he would have denied Sam anything, no matter what his lover might ask. His teeth sunk deep into the already purpling bruise he’d made on Sam’s skin, hard enough that he knew if he wanted to he probably could have broken the skin. The pulse beating so hard and fast underneath his tongue rushing into his mouth in a coppery red flood. Only the fact that he didn’t trust the bluntness of his teeth, not wanting to hurt Sam or make him bleed too much from a wound that he couldn’t control, the only thing that held him back.

Even though he wanted, more than anything at that point, to taste Sam’s blood. To taste Sam’s emotions again, the lust and pleasure and love like Sam had shown him before. Fuck he wanted that so much… He could probably come again just from the taste of Sam’s blood.

Dean tightened his grip on Sam’s cock, stroking harder and faster, just like his lover seemed to want. Just this side between pleasure and pain. Coating his fingers with Sam’s dripping precome to give his lover a nice slick channel to thrust up into and let him jack Sam off that much harder. Fuck, Sam was so hard in his hand he was like steel.

When Sam finally cried out and came, only then did Dean pull away from biting and sucking on the vampire’s neck because he wanted to watch. Awed when Sam’s face twisted in such a mask of pleasure he looked like he was in agony instead. His eyes raking down Sam’s trembling body, and pulsing cock. Licking his lips as he watched every thick rope of come shoot from Sam’s dick and splash across his chest and stomach, milking the next one from him.

“Fuck, so hot, Sam. So hot…” He breathed, and scooted down. His tongue swiping across Sam’s sweat and come soaked stomach before the other man was even done shooting. Moaning as he continued to stoke Sam through his orgasm, licking hungrily at the trails of semen, and moaning when he felt Sam’s come splash his cheek with the next pulse of his cock for his efforts.

Sam was almost surprised Dean didn't bite hard enough to draw blood. He knew what his blood would taste like, knew how good it would taste to his blood mate, and knew how badly Dean was probably craving it. He gasped as Dean's teeth left his neck. But the waves of pleasure were so strong he couldn't voice his complaint. He wanted Dean to share his blood though, wanted Dean to know his passion. As soon as he had enough control to think beyond the shear relief at finally coming, or feeling Dean's tongue on his stomach making him groan, drawing forth another strong spurt or come, he bit into his wrist hard enough to get the blood flowing. He dribbled the blood across his stomach to mix with the semen already there. He held his wrist out if Dean would rather drink from him.

"The taste," he panted, "won't last long but it's still strong if you want it."

Dean could smell the blood the second that Sam bit into his wrist and lifted his head from the vampire’s stomach with a groan. Watching hungrily as the bright red drops splattered against Sam’s skin, the young man didn’t waste any time trailing his tongue through the bright crimson mingled with white trails along the other man’s abdomen. Shuddering in pleasure as the taste of Sam’s blood and the taste of Sam’s come mingled on his tongue.

The taste of his lover’s passion. The taste of his Sam’s love… perfect… utterly perfect…

He pulled Sam’s wrist to his mouth, sealing his lips over the small wound, sucking hard. His whole body shuddered as a feeling like a second orgasm, or even a third, washed over him. Only stronger. More intense, if that was even possible. He probably should be used to the feeling by now, how the taste of Sam’s blood would affect him, but he didn’t think he ever would be. Dean moaned and sighed in contentment at the same time.

All too soon it seemed the feelings washing through him began to fade and Dean sighed again, almost in regret, as his sucking on Sam’s wrist lessened. Licking the wound gently until he finally let the other man pull his arm away and Dean let himself relax, blissfully spent, across his lover’s chest.

Sam wrapped one arm over Dean's back, gently caressing the sweaty skin and moving up to run his fingers through the short wet hairs at the nape of Dean's neck.

"God that was good," Sam sighed happily. He was pleased there had been no moment of panic for him, pleased that for those few minutes thoughts of Vanessa had been completely swallowed by thoughts of Dean. How Dean had tasted as he drank from him, as he tasted him with his tongue…everywhere. The flavor of Dean's blood and come still lingered as a distant memory in his mouth.

Maybe this would convince Dean that fucking each other, the actual deed itself, wasn't necessary in their relationship. Sure, he would love it, love to do it, but he had absolutely no bitches about just how good Dean had made him feel. He still wasn't entirely certain how Dean felt about drinking his blood. He knew Dean got off, seriously got off, on Sam biting him. He knew why he liked biting. Between the blood and the pressure on his sensitive teeth it was a damned erotic combination. Was it the same for Dean? Dean didn't have the sensitive teeth, but the blood mate in him allowed him to taste the blood as vampires tasted it. At least he guessed it did. Dean reacted to it like a vampire.

He would ask one day, but not today. He pulled a blanket over them. He was not motivated in the least to move from where he was or to have Dean move off of him. Purring, he felt himself drift off to sleep.