Sam slept deeply and even his dreams were not the normal nightmares they had been of late. They were of him and Dean together, laughing or drinking or horsing around. Some hunts, and definitely some sex sprinkled in there. Even though he slept deeply, his inner clock told him when dawn was approaching and he opened his eyes, instantly awake. He took a moment to admire the beautiful face of his lover wrapped securely in his arms. His bloodmate. His almost vampire. Dean couldn't be more perfect. Sam didn't have to worry about Dean needing blood like a vampire did, yet, Dean could bite and drink from him, and enjoyed Sam biting and drinking from him. Certainly they had healing and hurdles to cross, but that would come with time. When each was ready. Sam was pleased and even surprised that he had been able to move forward enough to welcome Dean inside him. Given time, Dean would probably be able to do the same. He hoped so at any rate. But there was no rush and if it never happened, it didn't matter, so long as Dean was with him.

He didn't want to leave Dean alone without telling him he was off to hunt. They were both still skittish about being out of the other's sight or not knowing where the other one was. He would feel more comfortable if Dean were awake and able to defend himself while he was out hunting.

Sam gently ran his hand up and down Dean's muscular chest as he planted feather light kisses on Dean's cheek, working his way down to those precious lips. In between kisses he whispered, "Time to wake up, lover. Time for me to hunt."

The soft touches over his face coaxed him awake gently despite his internal clock telling him it was way too early to get up. Ignoring the fact he’d had more than enough sleep, sleep that was a lot more restful than he’d had in weeks, hell, maybe even months. Maybe he’d grown soft over the last few years, because getting up before the ass crack of dawn for training with his father certainly hadn’t been out of the ordinary when John Winchester was alive. At least this wakeup call was a lot more pleasant, he had to admit that.

Dean made a small appreciative sound when he felt the brush of the other man’s lips, Sam’s warm breath tickling a little as he whispered against them. The young man’s lips twitched in a smile, even though he didn’t respond right away. Pretending to be asleep for just a few more moments so the touches would continue, before he finally cupped the back of his lover’s neck and gave him a real kiss.

“Don’t forget to brush your teeth.” Dean reminded the vampire when he finally released the other man. “And be careful.”

He watched Sam leave, then laid there in the warmth of their bed for a few more minutes before he sighed, stretched, and finally pushed himself up. He wasn’t going to get any more sleep, not while Sam was gone, and he’d really had more than enough rest. So he might as well make himself useful.

Dean got up, grabbed his jeans from the floor, and put them on before he left their room. It was kind of strange, he’d spent more time here than he usually stayed in one place anywhere, except Bobby’s, and he hadn’t even really explored the house. Well, beyond the kitchen, bathroom, and guest room that he and Sam were using.

He knew one of the doors led to the adjoining bathroom, so the door next to it must be Jacob’s room. Dean made his way down the hall towards the living room area where there was another closed door. From the muffled snores coming from the other side that must be where Bobby was sleeping. Dean made his way quietly over to it and cracked open the door just to check on the older hunter. Immediately assaulted by much louder snores that made him grin a little. Bobby was fine, of course. The man could sleep anywhere. Right now he was conked out on a fold out couch bed in what looked like a den. Dean shut the door again quietly, not seeing what he’d been looking for, and actually quite glad it hadn’t been in there.

The house wasn’t all that big though so he didn’t have to search long. He found the door that led downstairs to the basement, where he assumed the laundry and everything was. The next door he opened was to a small cluttered office where he finally found the computer that Jacob mentioned earlier was. Though Dean wondered if calling it a computer was being too kind, since he would have accused the thing of being as old as Jacob himself if he didn’t know that they didn’t have computers back then. You know, back in the stone age.

Sighing softly Dean sat down in the desk chair and booted the thing up, barely managing not to groan when he tried to connect to the internet and heard the fucking dial up modem. This was going to take forever…

Sam slipped out into the night, a gun in a holster strapped to his chest and two machetes strapped on his back. He didn't plan on using the weapons to take down the deer, but he wasn't about to go off into the dawn without them. He padded silently into the woods, pausing, listening, and sniffing the air.

After about fifteen minutes he finally caught scent of his target and slowly worked his way toward the small herd. He waited downwind until they came into view. It was a small herd of just a couple, one with a fawn. He sat and waited patiently for them to grow closer. When he was confident he could take down the deer of interest he sprinted forward. The startled deer kicked and one hoof caught Sam square in the chest. Sam fell back, cussing. He regained his footing and put on another burst of speed but the deer were already scattered.

Well crap.

He wandered for a little while until he finally tracked down more deer. He was more cautious this time and had out one of his machetes. He didn't want to lose this one again. For the way his chest hurt, he was going to need the fresh blood. It was harder to be patient, but he waited and struck, being more careful to nail the deer from the side. He took down the young doe quickly. He was hungrier than he thought and feasted, savoring the taste of the wild as he drank deeply. He couldn't deny he was glad Dean wasn't around to watch. He knew it apparently didn't bother Dean, but his other lovers, except for Michael of course, had not liked watching him feed.

After drinking his fill, he dressed the deer and hauled it back to Jacob's, hanging it in a tree out of the reach of scavengers. His clothes were bloodcoated but he only stripped off his shirt. The pants weren't too bad but would need washing. He looked at his chest where he'd been kicked. One hell of an impressive bruise. Might even have a cracked rib. He shrugged mentally. It would heal soon enough. He'd wrap it after his shower.

He slipped in the back door and wasn't surprised Dean was up, obviously in Jacob's office. He shook his head and poked his head in the door. "Dude, he only uses that computer for accounting for his farm. He's got a wireless network. His laptop is ought to be in the right hand desk drawer. I'm going to go shower." He grinned. "And brush my teeth. Would you get some coffee on?"

It had been almost painfully slow going, but Dean had managed to find what he was looking for. That didn’t mean he’d liked what he found though. The vampire nest had definitely been busy, though not in the normal sense. Sure, there were the missing person reports, but there were no bodies found drained of blood. Nothing that would alert all the hunters within a hundred mile radius that it was vampires they were dealing with.

That didn’t mean there were no bodies. Of the twenty or so people that had been reported missing, six had been found across three states. The ones found were always the same… two young men… strung up like pieces of meat, their bodies tortured, ripped apart in such brutal ways they had to use DNA or dental records to identify them…

The police photos he’d managed to download after hacking into the local sheriff’s offices where the murders took place had made him sick to his stomach. They were calling it the work of a serial killer, but Dean knew better. Not when the young men’s descriptions so closely matched him and Sam… before they were ripped apart of course. Not when the coroners reports said that the men were tortured for hours… and sexually assaulted… before they finally died…

It was a clear message for him and Sam.

Two more young men had been reported missing last night, both with descriptions that matched him and Sam. Their bodies hadn’t been found… yet… were they even still alive now? Were they wishing they were dead? While he and Sam had been making love and playing around the last few days these men had been suffering every horror he and Sam had, and then some…

Dean hadn’t realized he wasn’t alone anymore and when he heard Sam’s voice he jumped practically a foot in the air, spinning around in the chair and grabbing the first thing he could use as a weapon, and old paper cutter. Of course he relaxed a little when he realized it was Sam, but he simply couldn’t return his lover’s amused grin. At least he managed a shaky nod and stood at the other man’s request. Coffee… yeah… at least he could do that.

“Yeah. Sure.”

Sam's grin disappeared with Dean's reaction and the pallor that colored his lover's face. He tossed his bloodied shirt on the floor and strode to Dean's side, pulling Dean into an embrace. He ran his blood stained fingers through Dean's hair. The young man's scent was an almost overpowering collection of pain, disgust, horror, guilt…and more emotions he didn't care to sift through and name.

He saw the police report on the computer about two men missing. He might have thought Dean knew them but based on the scents coming from his lover, he knew the missing men had something to do with Vanessa. As he held Dean, his eyes scanned the things Dean had printed off. People missing. Bodies found of men, men basically matching the forms of the young hunter and himself. He didn't need to read the details to know what Vanessa was doing. One glance over the notes of the states and Sam knew exactly where the bitch was headed. She was going to the location of the last nest Sam had cleaned out before Jessica had been killed. It had been a large nest, well dug in, and overall a pretty nasty affair. He'd had to resort to fire to get some of them out and he had suspected a few had escaped. Making matters worse, he'd done some major demon exorcising in the area. One of them had been a pretty powerful demon, the one that had probably gotten him on the demon radar to begin with.

After holding Dean for a few moments longer he finally broke the embrace and gave Dean a light kiss on his cheek.

"She wants us to feel guilty, wants us too torn up inside to think clearly. We can't let her rush us into doing something stupid. If we don't take her down, she'll just keep killing. We might have a to pay the price of losing a few more lives now to ensure she doesn't have the rest of eternity to kill again and again. We can't afford to be victims anymore. We have to start being hunters again." Sam stared into those shaken but beautiful green eyes.

"Get the coffee going. I'll get showered. When Bobby gets up, we'll sit down and start working on a plan of action. We can spend the day training and I can confirm our backup tomorrow evening."

He gently cupped Dean's cheek with his palm. "We'll take her down, Hunter and burn that bitch into ash after we've killed her.

The embrace wasn’t all that unexpected, and Dean certainly didn’t mind it. Even though Sam smelled like blood… he didn’t care. Dean couldn’t deny he’d been shaken up by what he’d discovered. Of course he’d known that vampire bitch was twisted and evil but this… he wasn’t sure there was even a word for this.

Sam’s words though… he’d been expecting some kind of reassurance from the other man… maybe that’s even what this was meant to be… but it was anything but. The light kiss left him feeling cold and at first he could only stare at Sam in shock. But when the other man touched his face it broke his momentary paralysis and he knocked his lover’s hand away. The vampire’s touch anything but comforting right now.

“We might have to pay the price of a few more lives? We’re not paying any fucking price! They are!” Dean snapped, pointing towards the ancient computer, with the police report of the two missing men still on the screen. His voice rising with anger and his eyes narrowed as he continued.

“Those men didn’t do anything wrong, but they’re paying the price. For us.. They’re being tortured because of us! For no other reason because they look like us! Those men could still be alive, and you want me to…”

Dean couldn’t even repeat Sam’s far too casual words regarding those men, like they meant nothing to him. Maybe they didn’t. Bobby had told him before what Sam Cristo, the hunter, was like. How he… didn’t like civilian witnesses. After everything that had happened he had almost forgotten, or maybe he just didn’t believe it anymore after everything that Sam had done for him. Now he was seeing Sam Cristo the hunter up close and personal. Then again, why should Sam care about those men? Or any human? He wasn’t human. They were nothing but a meal to him…

Disgusted Dean pushed past Sam and quickly walked out of the office. He didn’t want to even look at the vampire right now. The young man made his way to the den and knocked sharply on the door, not waiting for Bobby to reply before he opened it.

“Bobby, wake up. We have a problem.”

Sam was shocked by Dean's reaction, by the way Dean pushed him away. He stared after the furious young hunter baffled. Sam was definitely startled by the disgust he smelled coming from his lover. It was like a machete to the neck and stunned barely began to cover it. Didn't Dean get it? It was a trap. Was the young hunter really so impetuous and naïve? How had he survived this long? Vanessa knew Sam would do everything in his power to prevent more people from dying, but she also knew his reputation was one of caution and patience. Was she counting on sentiment and emotion driving them to rush in in an effort rescue the two men that were quite probably dead or nearly so? Had she turned the other men before killing them? Had they been beheaded? He needed a lot more information before rushing blindly in, especially if she was holing up where he suspected she was going to.

The hurt he felt was compounded by the fact that instead of standing and arguing with Sam, Dean turned to his human friend. Had he no faith in Sam as a hunter? Did he think Sam was just a cold hearted bastard? He didn't give Sam the chance to explain the ways of vampires when it came to vengeance. There was no doubt Dean was impetuous and he wondered if indeed this had contributed to the death of the young man's father.


He turned away from his bloodmate, wounded by Dean's anger, disgust, and lack of faith. Sam looked down at the bruise on his chest. He'd done no training since he'd rescued Dean from the nest and had suffered tremendous physical and mental damage since then. If he were going up against humans that might not concern him. Vampires? There was no room for error with them.

He picked up his bloodied shirt and went to the shower, stripping once he reached his room. Dean had agreed to let him run the show when it came to going after Vanessa. Obviously Dean's word meant jack-shit if he decided that wasn't the way he wanted to play it. Sam should remember that. Dean said he would stay with Sam, but how long that would last…just until Dean got tired of him. Or pissed at him. Fine.

Sam step under the shower spray before it had even begun to warm up.

*

Bobby grumbled at the pounding on the door. God dammit. This was only the second night he'd been able to get any real sleep, either because of worry about Dean or because of the snoring machine that was Jake, or both. Dean was safe. Bobby had his own god damned room.

He cracked open his eyes and glared at the door as if to set it on fire. Before he could even answer, the door was open and Dean stood in the hall, looking more than a bit upset. Problem?

"Yeah we got a problem. It ain't even five in the morning. What in hell is so fucking important that I couldn't sleep for another hour or two?"

Maybe under normal circumstances Dean wouldn’t have been fazed by Bobby’s angry impatient tone or the death glare the older hunter was throwing at him for waking him up in the middle of the night. Right now though, it was like salt in a wound… hell, salt? Try acid. For a moment Dean could only stare at the older man before his expression hardened.

“Forget it.” Dean replied sharply before turning and walking away from the den back to his room.

Fine.

Sam didn’t give a damned about what was happening to those men. Even Bobby wasn’t interested in hearing what he had to say, and the older man should have known he’d never have woken him up unless it was really fucking important. No one else wanted to do anything. No one else wanted to even try to save those men? Dean would do it himself.

He knew he probably didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell, but what else could he do? Sit here twiddling his thumbs knowing that six people had already been literally ripped apart because of him, and two more people were going through the same right this second! Yeah, he knew it was a trap. But he couldn’t just do nothing!

Even if the only thing he accomplished was giving the vampire bitch someone else to flay alive rather than innocent civilians…

So he grabbed the keys to the impala off of the night stand as well as his duffel. He heard the shower going in the bathroom but he didn’t care. He threw most of his clothes in the bag, not really caring if he got everything, and stalked out to his car.

Sam heard Dean in the other room tossing things about. Heard the rattle of car keys….and then heard the front door slam.

What the fuck?

No, Dean was not that god damned much of a fucking idiot, was he?

Sam practically fell getting out of the shower. He grabbed his blood soaked jeans and yanked them on then rushed out after Dean. Dean was at the car door of his Impala with the bitchface from hell. Sam used every bit of his vampiric abilities and jumped from the porch, hit the ground, bounded over the hood and knocked Dean away from the car door.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sam shouted at him, blocking the driver's side door.

Dean landed on the ground hard from the powerful shove he hadn’t been expecting, though he probably should have. Sam’s angry shout did nothing to quell the anger festering inside of him searching blindly for an outlet. Most of it certainly directed at the vampire bitch doing all of this, and a good portion of it directed at himself as well for the deaths that were already on his conscience. But there was definitely anger directed at Sam and right now the vampire standing in front of him was the only real outlet for all of that anger.

Which was why once Dean was on his feet again he didn’t really think about why he shouldn’t be striking back. Especially since Sam had struck first and made him eat dirt, it was only fair he returned the favor.

“Get the fuck out of my way!” The young man shouted back, his hands curling into fists and his body instinctively dropping into a defensive stance. He couldn’t help but recall all the times Sam had said that he was incapable of kicking the vampire’s ass if he tried. Well, if Sam didn’t move right the fuck now he was going to see just how well Dean could hand the vampire’s ass to him.

Even if he couldn't smell it, the sheer fury in the young man was unmistakable. It was obvious from his stance that Dean fully intended to go through Sam, or at least try to, if Sam didn't get out of his way. Did Dean really think he could take a much more experienced hunter and full-blooded vampire down in hand to hand?

Under-estimating an enemy was always dangerous and while he knew Dean would never kill him, that didn't mean Dean wasn't a capable fighter. New up and comers took down the older and wiser on a regular basis. It was the way of the world. Sam fully intended to take down the vampire bitch and knew it wouldn't be so different than Dean beating him now. He had seen a badly injured Dean take down how many vampires in the nest when they made a run for the phone? Dean was fully healed, or nearly so, as was Sam. And Dean wasn't fully human. His strength and speed were an unknown, and when powered with the anger he saw in the hunter, it was a terribly dangerous combination. Sam didn't want to hurt Dean, he needed Dean at one-hundred percent if they were going in after Vanessa, and it was obvious from his past experience with the man that Dean would come, no matter what his condition. He didn't figure reasoning with Dean would gain him anything, but he had to try. That didn't mean he wasn't going to be ready for Dean coming at him anyhow. He did have a knack for pissing Dean off, after all.

"A hunter going in without intel is a dead hunter. One unprepared hunter can't take her down. Or are you going to trade yourself for the newest men she's taken? Does she turn them first so they can be tortured longer? Do you know? Then attempting to rescue them won't save them. They're already dead!" Sam yelled at him. "I know every minute we wait more people could be dying. This is vampire vengeance Dean and she's playing by a whole new set of rules. You can't tell me your father would approve of this! This won't make up for your father's death. He trained you to be a hunter. Start acting like one instead of a fucking self-sacrificing guilt ridden son. Your father didn't give his life for you to throw it away!"

If Sam was trying to piss him off... well, the vampire had already accomplished that and then some back in the house. Sam’s words now literally made him see red. Sam didn’t know a fucking thing about his father! Hell, Sam didn’t know a fucking thing about him if he really thought that’s what all this was about. This had nothing to do with his father! This had to do with the innocent people dying because of them.

The last threads of his control snapped and nothing holding back the tide of fury he felt, he launched himself at the vampire with a vicious growl. He’d hit Sam more than once before. He knew this time he didn’t have the advantage of surprise or the vampire holding himself back because he didn’t want to give away what he was.

“You know every second we waste more people are dying, and you don’t fucking care! You don’t know if they’re already dead or not but you’re not even going to try to save them!” Dean yelled as he struck. Sam managed to easily dodge his first several blows of course, but Dean still managed to keep up with the vampire. Then, maybe by luck more than skill, the young man managed to land a blow to Sam’s jaw with enough force behind it to send the vampire back over the hood of his car. His knuckles throbbed painfully and he smelled blood, either his own or Sam’s, but he didn’t care. He wasn’t the least bit satisfied.

“My father taught me to save people! Not sit around twiddling my thumbs while innocent people are dying! How many people have to die because of us before the price becomes worth the risk?! Eight? Ten? Twenty? Fifty?! What if it was someone you actually gave a damn about?! What if it was Jacob?! What if it was... your wife?!”

Dean had almost asked, ‘what if it was me?’ but he honestly didn’t want to know that answer.

Sam saw immediately that he had succeeded once again in pissing Dean off but good.

"Of course I care!" Sam yelled back. "If I didn't care about people do you think I'd be eating fucking cow's blood? I sure as hell don't do it for the taste. Wake the fuck up. It doesn't matter how many she kills. She will continue to kill. Our deaths will not satisfy her. She will recreate us when ever she can and as often as she wants. Long after our deaths she'll still be killing because of us. It's the way of the vampire when war is declared. The deaths of those men is the raising of the colors. Even if we gave ourselves to her, she would continue to kill simulacrums of us. Because she can."

He wasn't at all surprised when Dean launched himself at the vampire. He was surprised by Dean's speed. The young hunter wasn't quite as fast as a vampire, but it was impressively close. Dodging and blocking the blows from the young man wasn't really a problem. Then Dean managed to slip one by him and sent him flying backwards over the car. A bit spitefully, he hoped he did some damage to that black paint job.

Rolling to his feet, Sam was seeing something like stars from the blow. That was damned impressive. Dean hadn't been that far away from actually breaking his jaw with that blow.

"You can't fucking save them if you're dead!" Sam snarled. "She did have my Jessica. How many in her nest were beautiful blonde women? Just like my Jess! It wouldn't matter to me who they had. Either the job is done right and we plan and bring in backup and do whatever it takes, even if it's a fucking nuke, to nail her ass, or we go now and spend eternity tortured by her. Watch her torture others in our stead while we recover. Everyone we know and love she'll destroy. She'll come after Bobby, she'll come after Jake. If she can track down anyone who ever gave you shelter, any woman you ever slept with, she'll kill them. Or turn them. The same with all of Jess's friends and family."

Sam launched himself at Dean surprised when the young man side stepped his attack. The two exchanged blows but most were blocked or dodged. Then Sam was done. He had had enough and made his move, getting behind Dean and putting him into arm lock, his other arm wrapped around Dean's throat. He kept Dean off balance so Dean couldn't twist free.

"Just yesterday you agreed to let me take the lead on this. Have you so little faith in the man who would die for you?" he whispered in Dean's ear then shoved Dean away violently. "No, wait. From the disgust rolling off you, I'm not a man, am I? I'm a cold-hearted half-breed demon, a vampire who doesn't give a damned about humans. They're just dinner," Sam spat.

Dean knew he was going to have plenty of bruises when this was all over. Just blocking some of Sam's blows hurt like a bitch as though the vampire had actually landed the hit… and he knew the vampire was pulling his punches. He was barely capable of keeping up with Sam, and he did not land any more punches after that one. Then, Sam decided to prove to him just how pathetic and helpless he really was by putting him into head lock easily. The vampire's grip like iron no matter how hard he struggled, but he couldn't break Sam's hold.

Until Sam finally shoved him away. Making his point.

He was just a useless, weak, and pathetic human. He wasn't even a hunter as far as Sam was concerned. He was nothing…

"Fine… you handle it." Dean finally spat back, turning away from Sam. Trying to ignore the emotion welling up within him making it hard to even breathe. Anger, pain, guilt, and utter helplessness…

They were just as much to blame for those men who were dying as she was. Yes, he was disgusted. As much with himself as he was at Sam. Maybe even more so.

Dean's words and tone bit hard into Sam. They had to find common ground here. They had to learn and understand how the other worked, how they approached hunting. They both knew there were going to be growing pains in their relationship, in and out of the bedroom. And this…Vanessa brought them together. Sam couldn't let her tear them apart. They would get through this. They had to.

"We'll handle it," Sam said emphatically. "Together. I need you with me on this. Just facing her…fuck, Dean, I'm terrified. If she had you too…I couldn't…" He swallowed hard, feeling his heart pound in his chest at just the thought.

"Dean, you took her down in that barn and allowed us to get away from her. Trust me, you have an edge on her because of that. She's going to be extra leery of you but it also means she'll want an extra pound of flesh from you.

"I'm pretty certain I know where she's going to. It's the last nest I nailed before Jessica was murdered. It's a cave, excellent defensive position, and it was a fucking bitch to clear out when they didn't know I was coming. This is going to be one ugly fight. There will be nest members on guard at all times. There won't be any go in to slice and dice. Worse, they'll have neck armor on. Leather or chain or solid metal."

Sam crossed to Dean and rested a hand on his shoulder. "Just give me today. Please. Let me practice with my machetes. She's a master with the sword. It was damned near pure luck I disarmed her that first time. We need to get prepared for this. I'll call people now instead of waiting until tonight, okay? I'll have the caves checked out, make sure she's there so we're not wasting time headed to the wrong place when we hit the road. Maybe…maybe we can be on the road by sundown. You're right, the longer we wait, the more pain and maybe even deaths we cause innocents." Sam turned Dean to face him. "Maybe sometimes I am too methodical, maybe too cautious, maybe too callus…and I lied, okay? If she had you, I wouldn't be able to hold back…Please Dean, I'm begging you. I want you as my hunting partner as much as I want you as my lover. Be my partner. Don't make me face her alone."

Dean knew that Sam was only telling him what he thought he wanted to hear. Sam didn’t need him. Sam didn’t even want his help. We’ll handle it… yeah right. Sam had already told him before that he didn’t even want his help with the vampire bitch. Sam had told him to stay away from her. The young man knew all too well if there was a way the vampire could force him to sit this one out entirely and Dean wouldn’t hate him forever, that Sam would love to take it.

Just an amusing fuck toy… for the man who’d raped him all those years ago, for the vampires who’d captured them, and now for Sam…

Dean knew that was unfair to Sam. He knew that Sam loved him. Maybe loved him too damned much. But Dean wasn’t feeling in a very understanding or charitable mood right now, certainly not to himself. What right did he have to feel loved and protected while there were, right now, two men in the vampire bitch’s clutches being raped and tortured to death in his place? And he was doing nothing to stop it or prevent it… had done nothing to stop or prevent the others she’d already killed…

The young man didn’t flinch or pull away from Sam when the other man laid his hand on his shoulder or when he was turned around, but he didn’t meet Sam’s eyes for a long time. When he finally did, it was only to give the other man a slight nod. What was there to say? Nothing really. Sam had made his point…

Though Dean couldn’t help but wonder if he really had been deluding himself all along that this… them… could work. He’d wanted to believe he deserved this… Sam, being loved, being happy for once in his fucking life… but life seemed determined to kick him in the nuts and remind him over and over why he didn’t deserve anything. For letting his father die… letting innocent people die… getting Sam into this whole damned mess in the first place…

It didn’t matter now. They had bigger things to worry about right now. He’d give Sam one day. He wouldn’t say anything more about the men, or try to leave without Sam. He wouldn’t do anything to make this more difficult for Sam. He sure as hell wasn’t going to let Sam go alone. But Dean couldn’t really promise Sam anything more than the day though. The guilt was already eating him alive right now.

“I need a drink.” The young man finally said with a heavy sigh, pulling away from Sam and heading slowly back into the house.

Dean's snapped "Forget it," had Bobby out of bed and pulling on his jeans. He knew that damned tone of voice. He stepped out onto the porch at the sound of voices and the scuffle coming from outside, gun in hand. For a minute, he thought he was going to have to shoot out a tire of the Impala to keep Dean from doing something foolish.

Dean put up a good fight against the vampire, but he could see Dean didn't think he had. He could see failure and guilt written in Dean's body language. He just wanted to throttle that boy. He stepped aside and let Dean go inside.

"That drink better damned well be coffee," Bobby rumbled after him. "We're training after breakfast."

Bobby's eyes came back to rest on the vampire. Sam's pants had blood on them and he was bare chested but lightly smeared with blood as well. Guess Jake was getting his venison. When Sam slowly approached the porch, Bobby gave him something of a grimace. "I see Dean's found out about the men."

"You knew?" Sam asked.

"Hell yes I knew. Got hunters checking up on the bodies, what's left of 'em. Heard back from one so far. The first two, they was lovers. Don't look like they was turned, but hard to be certain for what was left of them. Been trying to track down where the matriarch was headed. You knowing saves us some work. Was going to fill you boys in this morning."

"I don't…" Sam started. The look in Dean's eyes when Dean had finally looked at him was frightening. Dean didn't believe him, didn't believe Sam had any faith in him. Dean looked like a whipped dog. Lost. Confused. Hurt. "I don't know what to do, Bobby," Sam said softly. "Is he always like this?"

Bobby smiled a little at the vampire and patted him on the shoulder. "Self-esteem issues barely covers it. He ain't never forgiven himself, blaming himself for John's death. That has filled his young soul with pain that I ain't never been able to fix. Anyone else being hurt or killed cause of him, he don't take that well. Goes back to him feeling worthless from that son of a bitch who used raped him, to guilt over his daddy's death, to not knowing how to see beyond the next god-damned hunt. He ain't never had anyone to live for, son. He's got no faith that he's worth anything to anyone except as a target, a tool to give the supernatural evil something to focus on. I've seen him go on hunts that he right not should have survived. He didn't want to survive them. Happy ain't in his vocabulary no more and he don't feel he deserves it. Don't deserve to laugh or smile or take a moment to enjoy life. He's damaged goods, but he's a heart of gold. Damned fine hunter too."

Sam gave a silent nod. So much had happened in these past few weeks. "I'm going to shower," Sam said miserably and after retrieving his blood-soaked shirt, went into his room and stepped into the shower.

Bobby gave a sigh and returned to his room, setting the gun back beside the bed and picking up the folder of information he'd gathered. He went into the kitchen where Dean was. At least the boy had the coffee started.

"This is what I got so far," Bobby said, tossing the manila folder onto the table. "I got five of the best vampire hunters meeting up with us. Daniel Elkins, he'll be joining us here sometime today. Two others we'll pick up in Memphis. They ought to be there by nightfall. The remaining two are already hunting for a fresh scent based upon the last place the nest was. Since your boy seems to know where she's going, we'll be able to nail that nest that much faster." Bobby stared at the young man he thought of as family. "You ain't the first hunter who's had enemies hurt innocents because of 'em. Your daddy pissed off a witch once, rescuing three sisters from her, but the witch got away. That bitch took out eighteen girls 'fore your daddy caught up to her, including the three he'd rescued. That first time the girls had been meant for sacrificing. The deaths that followed, each three sisters, they was all killed ritually, died pretty terrible, and the rituals, they weren't for any actual spells. Was meant as a message for Johnny, to draw him in. That was that January your daddy dropped you off with me for a month or two when you was ten. He was terrified that witch would catch wind of him having a son and start killing young boys too. It ate him up, blaming himself for their deaths. He got damned near obsessive, making sure nothing else ever got away. Twice after that he near got himself killt going after what he was hunting when it got away. When you was eleven, that same fall, I know you remember him in the hospital 'cause he got tore up pretty bad on a hunt. It was cause he wouldn't let that wendigo get away long after he was too hurt to have any business following it. I ripped him a new asshole over that one.

"People die, son. Sometimes they die because of us and what we do. I was pretty new to hunting when I got a six year old boy killt. It ate me up, that boy dying in my arms cause I screwed up, and that after assuring that boy I'd get him home to his parents if he would just help me get out of the chain the goblin put me in. It's part of the job. Just like saving people is part of the job, sometimes people dying happens cause of us, too. No matter how good you are, Dean, it happens. I ain't met a hunter yet it ain't happened to at some point and usually, sad to say, it happens more than once."

Dean walked past the older man into the house without a word. Not bothering to even acknowledge Bobby’s remark regarding ‘training’ after breakfast. The last thing he was in the mood for right now was a fucking lecture.

He went into the kitchen anyway and started up a pot of coffee that he had no intention of drinking. Instead a little detective work found what he wanted, a bottle of high proof liquor, which Dean poured himself a generous glass and downed practically in one swallow. Let Bobby chew his ass out later, he didn’t care. He needed something to take the edge off or he was going to put his fist through a fucking wall instead.

Dean poured himself another glass and then all but collapsed into one of the chairs at the table, staring into the potent booze like it held all the answers of the universe. Hell, he wished it did. Bobby and Sam hadn’t come inside yet. He wondered what they were talking about. Him. No doubt. He wondered if Sam was trying to convince the older man to figure out a way to keep him behind. Hell, maybe Bobby was even agreeing with him. Dean was all but useless after all… well, except for getting other people killed. He was real good at that.

Sam was right about one thing though. No matter how many people he might save it would never change the fact that his father was dead, and it was his fault. Just like it didn’t change the fact that these men were being tortured and killed because of him… If he hadn’t been captured by the damned vampires in the first place, he and Sam might have never met. If he’d turned while he’d been hanging there in those chains then Sam would have simply beheaded him along with the rest of the vampires, Sam wouldn’t have tried to help him, and Sam wouldn’t have been taken by surprise by them later. Those men who had died would probably still be alive too…

Dean didn’t look up when Bobby came into the kitchen, tossing the folder down in front of it. It had in it exactly what Dean expected, much of the same information that Dean had found himself on the computer this morning. The fact that Bobby had waited until now to tell him ignited another spark of anger inside of him, but it withered and died into disappointment rather quickly. That the older hunter had known and not told him… it only confirmed that not even Bobby thought he would be good for anything in this hunt.

If Bobby’s stories about himself and his father were meant to make him feel ‘better’ somehow, they did anything but. People died… right… and it was still his damned fault. Nothing Bobby said or did was going to change that fact.

And then the older man’s words about the other hunters… Elkins… finally registered and Dean finally looked up at the older hunter, worry written all over his face.

“Call Elkins. Now. Tell him not to come. Sam’s run into him before. He tried to kill Sam.”

While Dean was flipping through the contents of the folder the coffee finished and Bobby poured them each a mug. He suspected Dean had already downed one or two tall shots of bourbon, before he had poured the one he stared into between his hands.

The truths he told Dean just weren't reaching him. Dean was too caught up in self-pity to hear him and he knew shaking the boy or yelling at him would just make Dean withdraw more, feel more worthless, feel like more of a screw-up.

When Dean told him to call Elkins and tell him not to come, that Elkins would hurt Sam, he frowned. He had simply come to accept Sam as another hunter at this point. He wanted to give Sam and Dean the best back up he could, but hell, any of the vampire hunters would potentially consider Sam a 'thing' that needed killing. Well, shit. He didn't cotton to the idea of it just being the three of them going up against a nest of a matriarch as vicious as Vanessa.

Bobby shook his head and pushed himself to his feet. "Guess I just think of Sam as a hunter 'stead of a…vampire." He gave a soft huff. "Good thing one of us is thinking straight about it." He looked at Dean. "It's going to be a bitch, just the three of us, but we'll figure out a way to take them down."

Dean closed the folder in front of him and pushed it away from himself. He didn’t want to look at the pictures anymore. He felt sick enough already, and besides, the images were already burned into his memory forever. He wouldn’t be able to forget them if he tried.

When Bobby mentioned how he thought of Sam as just another hunter instead of a vampire… yeah, Dean could understand that. Sometimes Dean forgot too, and he was the one fucking Sam, so he couldn’t really blame the older man for trying to call in other hunters to help them.

Dean shook his head a little when he saw the older man’s worry about the ‘three’ of them taking care of the nest.

“Sam’s already called some other vampires for backup. They’re going to be taking down the nest.” Dean replied, picking up his glass and downing the remains of it rather than the mug of coffee Bobby had put in front of him.

Yeah, Dean knew he was risking pissing off the older hunter something good, but he didn’t care too much about that right now. He was an adult, damn it. If he wanted something to drink harder than coffee before 6am that was his choice. Besides, it wasn’t like he was drunk. Yet.

Bobby gave a slow nod, watching Dean down his second, third, fourth, or whatever it was drink.

"They are, are they?" Bobby said. He took a drink of his coffee, letting the bitter brew roll around in his mouth a minute before swallowing it down. "All right. I'll tell Sam you aren't coming."

Bobby pushed himself to his feet and put the bottle of bourbon on the table beside Dean's glass, amber beads still scattered in the bottom of it. "When you're sober enough you don't wrap your car around a tree, you head to my place," Bobby said, disappointment clear on his face, but he was at the end of his rope. When Dean got like this, he had never been able to reach him. All he could do was make certain the man Dean cared about survived the fight. "I'll back Sammy up, make sure he gets through this alive. Just like I backed your daddy up when we killed that son of a bitch who raped you. Those bastards who touched you this time, they'll pay too. I promise you that, son." Bobby squeezed Dean's shoulder. "If there's anything I can do to help you get through this, let me know. All I ask is this. That man in there, he loves you. When this is over, when he comes to you, don't turn away, don't run from him. Jake told me Sam…that Sam needs you." Bobby couldn't bring himself to tell Dean what Jake suspected Sam would do if he lost Dean. Dean didn't need the extra guilt. He made enough for himself without Bobby's help.

Bobby took the coffee cup Dean hadn't touched, and his own, and walked down the hall. He yelled into Sam and Dean's bedroom. "Hurry your ass up Cristo. Meet me on the porch. I got some calls to make then you and I are going discuss how the hell we're taking down this nest and do some training. Already got your coffee."

Bobby’s words were a little bit like a slap to the face, but Dean knew he deserved them. He had just told the older hunter that Sam had called in other back up to take care of the vampires. Dean hadn’t said he wasn’t going to go with Sam.... even if he would be useless to the vampire. But apparently Bobby was taking that choice away from him now, and... he supposed he couldn’t blame the older man.

Dean looked at the bottle that Bobby set in front of him. The liquor he’d already drunk felt like acid boiling in his gut by this point. It was the first time that Bobby had actually encouraged him to get fucking plastered, and how the hell was he supposed to react to that? Knowing just how low of an opinion that Bobby really had of him...

Then the older man decided to drop another bomb on him. Bobby and his father... his father had known... about the man who’d raped him. His father had actually known... One of the few comforts that Dean had taken in life was that his dad had died without knowing what a whore his son was... that his father had died maybe believing he was worth something... now...

Dean felt like the world had dropped out beneath him. He was too stunned to pull away from the hand that Bobby had rested on his shoulder at the time, but now the memory of that touch burned him. How could Bobby do this to him? Why? It made him feel sick... so damned sick... he just wanted to vomit like he had the morning after...

Go to Bobby’s place... like hell... in fact he wasn’t sure at this point if he’d ever see the older hunter again. All he ever accomplished was causing pain, disappointment, and suffering to everyone around him... including himself. Dean heard Bobby’s call to Sam, and he pushed himself slowly up from the table and headed out back. Even that a bit of a slap in the face, remembering how... nice... it had been just yesterday, eating fucking barbecue, talking about the future... happy with Sam...

Now, everything had gone to hell in a hand basket, to say the least. Now, he just wanted to be alone. It was better for everyone...

Sam stepped into the shower as soon as it warmed up enough his teeth wouldn't start chattering. Fuck. The day was just going to hell. And the sun was barely on the rise. After lathering a washcloth he began washing his skin clean of the blood, suddenly hating even the smell of the crimson liquid that was his sustenance. It had been so much easier when it had just been him and Dean alone in that rickety house. No internet. No one to tell them what Vanessa had been doing while they recuperated from the physical injuries of what she'd done to them. While they tried to deal with the mental torture she had dealt them. But it had been just the two of them. Life with Dean was turning into one hell of a roller coaster. Dean was so damned knee-jerk emotional. And obviously Sam had gained no measure of trust from the man.

That wasn't fair he supposed but it felt like the truth. Dean would start to trust him, then strike out violently against him, catching Sam off guard again and again. How many times had Sam ended up on his ass, physically and mentally, thanks to Dean? He snorted softly. Sam had lost count. He didn't suck that badly at dealing with people…did he? He sure seemed to suck when it came to dealing with Dean. Dean was an emotional powder keg. Damaged goods, Bobby had called the young man. Yeah. That was an understatement. If Dean's long time father figure hadn't been able to help him, what chance in hell did Sam have to help him? He wasn't sure his love was enough.

He didn't take long in the shower and after drying off began to brush his teeth. Dean's words came back to him and he stared at himself in the mirror. What the hell was he doing? He felt so confused and torn up inside. A part of him wanted to leave Dean. Ever since he'd come into Dean's life he felt like he had just screwed the young man up worse. If it weren't for him, Vanessa would have never come after Dean. Of course…Dean would be a vampire now. Or dead. Though, he laughed bitterly to himself, that was sort of one and the same.

He heard Bobby's call to him to hurry up. He sighed. Yeah. Training. He looked at the bruise on his chest from the deer and wondered if he was up to facing Vanessa, if he would even survive it. He wasn't sure he was ready to face her, but the thought of Dean not waiting on him, of going in by himself to try to stop her alone terrified him. Ready or not, he had promised Dean they would leave tonight. So they would. He would just have to keep the faith he was good enough and that with Dean by him, they could take her down together.

Spitting the pink tinged toothpaste froth from his mouth, he gave a final rinse then went into his room and dressed. He stepped out into the hall. He could hear Bobby on the front porch talking on his cell. He could smell liquor as well as coffee and he smelled his lover and his lover's upset. The anguish he smelled in his lover's scent shredded his soul. No this had to be fixed. Somehow, this had to be fixed.

Screw Bobby and screw training. He headed into the kitchen and followed Dean's scent out the back door. He stepped out to see Dean standing alone in the twilight of the morning. The scent of his lover in pain was like a physical blow washing over him. He wanted to approach Dean, pull Dean into his arms, but he was so afraid of a repeat performance.

He stepped up next Dean and cleared his throat. "I, uh, I brushed my teeth," Sam finally said. "Are you going to…leave me?" he asked softly, feeling the fear coil inside of him at what Dean might answer, knowing his own scent reeked of that fear. He tried to steel himself against the heartbreak that always seemed to be his destiny.

Dean wasn’t sure how long he’d been standing outside staring out at the dark woods around Jacob’s house. Long enough for the sky to begin to going from pitch black dotted with stars, to a slightly lighter shade of dark purple as the sun began to rise over the horizon. Not too long then, he supposed. Certainly not long enough for him to even begin to get a handle on all the fucked up issues racing around in his head.

When it rains, it fucking pours.

Just one seemed like too much to fucking deal with right now. But trying to deal with the guilt of the deaths that vampire bitch had caused because of them, things between him and Sam going to hell again which was mostly his fault, Dean knew, and Bobby letting the bomb drop that his father had known about… him being raped…

Christ… he didn’t know how to deal with this. He didn’t want to fucking deal with this. Not like he had much of a choice though… He couldn’t deny a part of him wanted to just run. To get in the Impala and drive without looking back, getting as far away from this place as he could, and find something evil and nasty to kill. To take out all his anger, grief, guilt, and frustration on as many evil sons of bitches he had to until he felt he could look at himself in the mirror again… or until one of the evil sons of bitches took him out instead.

He heard the back door open and even without looking knew it was Sam. He could smell him… god, it was still so fucking weird that he could recognize scents now. Like the slight mint of the toothpaste that Sam had used. The soap Sam had obviously washed with in the shower. Beneath that… fear, sadness, grief… it made it hard for him to breathe even before Sam’s whispered words practically choked him.

Dean found he couldn’t speak when he turned to look at Sam so he did the next best thing. All but throwing his arms around Sam and holding onto the man that felt like his only reason for living right now.

When he saw Dean's face, so filled with anguish it nearly took his breath away. And then Dean was in his arms and clinging to him like he was the young man's life raft. Sam choked back a sob and gathered the hunter in his arms. His handsome young lover. The vampire hung on to Dean just as tightly as Dean held him. He never seemed to say the right thing to the young man but this time, he hoped it got it right.

"I love you," Sam whispered. "I need you beside me more than anything else in this world."

He simply held Dean for a long time, finding comfort in those strong arms. He finally pulled back enough to look into his lover's eyes. A small smile touched his lips and he kissed Dean deeply, lovingly, trying to convey in that simple gesture what Dean meant to him and how much he treasured the young man.

Dean closed his eyes tightly against the tears that wanted to fall as Sam took him into his arms and held onto him just as tight as he held onto the other man. Even when Sam had every right to push him away. After what Dean had said to him... after what he had done to the vampire... Sam still held him. Still comforted him. Still... loved... needed...

It was so damned fucked up. He was so damned fucked up. Sam didn’t need this... he wanted to tell Sam that, but he just couldn’t seem to find his voice right now, so Dean simply held on. For as long as Sam would let him.

Christ... he was so damned pathetic...

When Sam started to pull away he reluctantly released his hold on the vampire and the smile Sam gave him practically broke his heart. But before he could say anything, Sam was kissing him and Dean couldn’t help but kiss back. He wanted to continue kissing Sam long after he’d run out of breath but the burning in his lungs eventually forced him to pull back. Panting heavily as he closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against the other man’s shoulder.

“You deserve better.” Dean finally managed.

Petting Dean's hair, the young man's words made his heart want to break. "I've had one night stands, I've had lovers, I've had wives. I'd trade them all for an eternity with you. For another night with you. For another sunrise with you. There is no one better, no one I want more than I want you."

Sam pulled Dean a little closer. "Part of me wants to beg you to just come away with me, to some secluded cabin where it's just the two of us and the rest of the world can go to hell. Part of me wants to beg you to stay here, stay safe while I go after Vanessa. And part of me can't stand the thought of you not being with me, beside me, for even an hour. I want you with me. Always."

He kissed Dean's hair. "So you have to stop thinking that you're useless, that everything is your fault and that you're unworthy. You hear me? None of it's true."

Dean closed his eyes tightly and tried to swallow back the sob that tried to escape him brought on by Sam’s words. Christ… what the hell had he done to deserve this kind of devotion? Nothing. Absolutely nothing, in his opinion, and he wasn’t sure he could do what Sam was asking. How could he stop thinking it was his fault, when it was? How could he stop thinking he was unworthy when he had only caused pain to anyone he cared for? How could he stop thinking he was useless when he truly felt that way, when everything turned to shit no matter what he did?

He couldn’t deny that Sam’s offer for them to just go, somewhere secluded where they could be alone, just the two of them, was really fucking tempting right about now. Everything seemed so much easier when it was just the two of them. Maybe… once this was all over, he’d take Sam up on that. To just go away for a while where they could forget about the rest of the fucking world for a change, Dean liked that idea very much right now.

But, not until they’d dealt with that bitch Vanessa. Together. He wasn’t going to let Sam do this alone, damn it. Dean was going to make sure that bitch regretted ever living this long.

“I think your standards are a bit low.” Dean finally muttered, taking a deep breath and letting it out before he lifted his head from Sam’s shoulder to meet the vampire’s eyes. “I’m sorry… for earlier…”

Sam felt the tension in Dean and simply held him while he hoped his words sank in. He really couldn't explain the kinship, the connection, the love he felt for Dean. It wasn't just being bloodmates. There was something in him that wanted and needed Dean, maybe some sort of kinship only made stronger by what the two of them had endured. Yeah, he could tell he was going to want to throttle the young man time and again, but he was pretty certain that feeling would be reciprocated.

He chuckled softly at Dean's words. "I don't."

He looked down in the green eyes of his lover. He smiled at Dean's apology though some of what Dean had done and said still stung. "We're going to go through some serious growing pains. We've both been solitary a long time. We're both use to doing things our own way. We'll have to find compromises without trying to kill each other. Most importantly, we have to have faith in each other. Even if we get pissed as hell at each other, we have to have faith."

Leaning down, he covered Dean's mouth with his own and gently kissed him. When he pulled back he nudged Dean toward the house. "Now go eat a little something. Even if it's just toast. I'll get those calls made. Then I'd like you to help me train. Even if Bobby is better with the sword, you have the speed and strength of a vampire, or at least, pretty damned close. I was hard pressed to keep up with you. I need to practice against that speed. And you need to practice against me."

Growing pains… yeah… guess that was a mild way of putting it. It might go a little bit easier if Dean wasn’t flipping out on Sam all the time, or acting like a complete basket case. Dean hoped that Sam was right and they wouldn’t end up killing each other before they worked it all out. Yeah, they both had plenty of issues. Hell, Dean’s issues had issues. Dean still couldn’t help but think no matter what Sam might say that the other man would be a hell of a lot better off without him.

But he wouldn’t… couldn’t… push Sam away now. He needed Sam. Christ, needed him so damned much, and that was scary as hell on its own. That he honestly wasn’t sure what he would do without Sam now… fuck… if anything happened to Sam…

He wished he could say Sam’s kiss alone was enough to erase his doubts, fears, and guilt. Dean wasn’t sure anything could, but at least it was enough to help center him a little. Making him feel a little less lost. Reminding him he wasn’t alone… even when he was being a complete ass to the other man. Yeah, Dean knew he would have a lot to make up for when this was all over.

Still, he nodded a little when the vampire told him to go inside while Sam made his calls, even though eating was pretty much the last thing Dean wanted to do right now. He was sure anything he ate would just come right back up again. Though he frowned a little doubtfully when Sam mentioned he was almost as fast and strong as a vampire and Sam had a hard time keeping up with him. It certainly hadn’t seemed that way to Dean, but he merely nodded again, and went back inside to the kitchen.

The bottle and glass were still sitting on the table. Dean grabbed the bottle and put it away without drinking from it then put his used glass into the sink. He still didn’t feel like eating so he grabbed a coffee mug and poured himself some of the still warm coffee to drink instead.

Sam followed Dean inside. "Toast," he scolded Dean as he headed toward their room to get his phone. "That alcohol and coffee mix will eat a hole in your gut."

If Dean wasn't going to eat that was okay, but he really thought Dean would feel better with a little something in his stomach, but he wasn't going to harass Dean any further about it. Still, Sam was the one who lived on liquids, not Dean. After grabbing his phone and machetes he headed out to the front porch.

"Yer coffee's cold," Bobby said simply.

"That's okay. I'll pretend it's iced coffee."

"Things better?" the old hunter asked quietly.

Sam gave a shrug as he sank into the chair beside Bobby. "For the moment. He's coming with us. At least I think he is. I don't suppose I could convince you to sit this one out?"

Bobby scowled. "I'm the whole reason this mess got started."

"What is it with you two? Do you carry around extra buckets to pour your guilt in to?" Sam said with exasperation. "Dean got caught…"

"'Cause I sent him to check out the nest," Bobby interrupted.

"He got caught because a bottle of deadman's blood got smashed in his trunk. They smelled it and knew he was a hunter. Just before, apparently, I started watching the nest. I went in and damned near got beheaded by Vanessa. I let her get away. Even if I'd tried to chase her down, she'd have probably gotten away. This is no one's fault or everyone's fault, okay? Shit happens. Who knows how many blonde woman she's killed because of my Jessica. Now she's killing men that look like Dean and me. She's a vicious beast and she's got to die. I'll tell you what I told Dean. They'll be expecting us…"

"Ya think?" Bobby snapped.

"You sure you two aren't blood relatives?" Sam shot back with a glare. "The vamps will be wearing neck armor. We can't just walk in and behead them. They'll lay traps, they'll have hostages, and half those hostages she'll probably turn. It's vampire war and that war will be ugly as sin with a lot of blood spilt. I don't want yours to be among them. Dean needs you."

Bobby considered long and hard. "All right, I'll stay out of the battle proper, but you're gonna need help with the hostages you do get free, and I can watch your back. I got two other hunters who aren't willing to back off of this hunt either. Barrows and Spring. They apparently know you."

Sam snorted softly. "Yeah, they know me. Let me guess, a few explicatives were interspersed with Cristo's a god-damned vampire?"

Bobby nodded. "Something like that. I asked 'em why they left that detail out when I was trying to find out more about you. Never heard so much hemming and hawing in all my life."

"They both owe me. They hate it, but they owe me. Saved their asses. Twice. The second time they discovered I was a vampire. They 'let' me go. They've never outted me, though which has sort of surprised me. At least, never outted me until now."

"They knew I was going to be working with you. After they 'warned' me, I told 'em you were calling in more of your vampire friends for back up. There was some heated discussion in the background. Look, I don’t' know…"

Sam held up his hand. "Don't worry about it. They cause a problem, we'll handle it. They might not like the fact I'm something they hunt, but they're willing to accept I don't feed on people. They will surely, albeit reluctantly, accept there are others like me. We can leave a vampire with you three. They can pretty much tell right away if whatever is coming out of the cave is human or vampire, unless they haven't turned enough yet for their heart to start stuttering."

"Stuttering?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, it's how I can tell the vampires from the untouched. Unfortunately, all too often the people I find there are already turning. I figure most people would want to die before a demonic animal binds with their soul. If there's a heaven…I don't know. I don't know if it matters. That is why other hunters say I'm ruthless and don't like civilians. The ones turning that I kill, they don't have their fangs yet. Since they don't have their fangs, I don't have to burn their bodies and their loved ones can take them home and bury them. But hunters think they were still civilians, so I'm labeled ruthless."

Bobby gave a slow nod. "That's…good to know."

Sam picked up his coffee and took a sip. Okay, maybe he couldn't pretend it was iced coffee. He handed it to Bobby. "Would you reheat that for me?"

Bobby snorted and pushed himself to his feet. "I need a refill anyhow."

"I'm going to make some calls, then I need some practice against someone good with a sword."

Bobby gave a nod. "I'm probably the better 'twixt me and Dean but he ain't bad. I'll be back out in a few, ready to spar. Going to grab me an egg sandwich I think, give you time to make your calls. I ain't seen Jake. He's always an early riser."

"He's out in the barn staying out of the way. I'm sure he'll wander back out soon enough."

Dean rolled his eyes a little behind Sam’s back at the other man’s remark as Sam walked through the kitchen.

“Nag.” He muttered under his breath, though he couldn’t stop the slight smile from curving his lips all the same. No, he definitely didn’t feel like eating, but maybe a slice of toast would help settle his stomach after all. If it would make Sam happy and stop the vampire from worrying about him, all the better. Besides, he felt like he could use a few more minutes to himself before going out to face Bobby.

So Dean began looking for the bread and threw a couple of slices into the toaster. As he waited for the toast to pop back up, Dean tried to ignore the manila folder still sitting on the table behind him. He knew if he started thinking about the men who were probably suffering horrible slow deaths right now while he was in here eating breakfast, everything in his stomach right now would come right back up again.

The bread had just popped up from the toaster and Dean was grabbing the butter out of the fridge when he heard the front door open. Dean looked up, almost expecting it to be Sam again coming to make sure he was having his damned toast, so he was a little surprised when Bobby walked into the kitchen instead.

“Hey Bobby.” Dean offered before turning his attention to his toast, grabbing a knife, and began buttering his toast. At least it gave him something to do while he considered what to say to the older man. Instead he simply asked, “Want some toast?”

The boy looked better. Still upset as hell, but better. Bobby rested his hand lightly on Dean's shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "Yeah, put me in some toast. I'm going to cook up and egg or two."

Bobby pulled out an iron skillet and set it on the stove to heat with some bacon grease in it then pulled out some eggs.

"Glad to hear you're feeling up to joining us. Sammy needs you beside him on this. He don't admit it, but I think he's pretty shaken up by this whole nastiness too," Bobby said, cracking the eggs, their contents spilling into the pan with a soft hiss. He pulled out a spatula and began stirring them, the dark gold spilling in to mix with the whites of the egg . "He doesn't want me in there, said it's a whole new type of game. Gotta admit, going up against vamps that got armor on their only weak spot don't sound real appetizing. But I'm not real thrilled you'll be in there without me at your back though." Bobby paused long enough to refill his mug and stuck his and Sam's into the microwave. That was the last of the coffee, but he didn't figure they'd be wanting any more. He turned back to stirring the eggs. "So, what do you want? There'll be two other hunters joining us, plus who ever Sam calls in. You want me in there watching your back or outside watching your back? You ain't gotta answer now, son if you ain't sure. Hell, we may completely revise whatever gameplan we come up with when we see this place she's holed up to make her stand."

“Ok.” Dean replied with a nod, grabbing the bread down from the cupboard again and throwing in a couple more slices for Bobby. The way the older man squeezed his shoulder definitely wasn’t unwelcome, and Dean felt himself relaxing a bit more. Dean really didn’t deserve a friend like Bobby. The older man was always there for him, no matter what, even when he didn’t know it. Just like Bobby had always been there for Dad. Even though the older man had threatened to shoot his dad full of buckshot on more than one occasion… Dean didn’t know what he’d do if he ever lost Bobby too.

Dean ate his toast at the counter rather than at the table, watching as the older hunter cooked up his eggs in an old fashioned iron skillet. He was definitely glad that the toast seemed to be sitting well in his stomach and deciding to stay there. In fact, the smell of the bacon grease and eggs was actually starting to make Dean’s mouth water and his stomach growled traitorously. Bobby always made the best damned eggs.

When Bobby mentioned him deciding to go on the hunt, Dean nodded a little, not quite sure what to say he just knew he wanted to put the fight he and Sam had behind him. Even though Dean knew he probably still had a lot to make up for his treatment of his lover. He hadn’t been thinking much at the time how this must be affecting Sam, and that wasn’t easily forgivable. Of course Sam would be shaken up… Dean had seen first hand how the vampire was right after they’d escaped… Dean was such an idiot.

Dean had to admit he was a little surprised that Sam had asked Bobby to stay out of the hunt, well, not really stay out of it, but stay out of the main fighting. Dean couldn’t help but be a little bit relieved that Sam had asked Bobby to, and Bobby had apparently agreed. Of course Bobby was a more than capable hunter, but he was also human. Yeah Dean was ‘human’ too, for the most part, but he was also different now too. It eased his mind a little to know he wouldn’t have to worry about Bobby as much, and he could concentrate on watching Sam’s back without having to split his attention between Sam and Bobby.

“You know I always want you at my back, Bobby, but I think Sam’s right. If things go badly…” Dean shrugged. “Guess we’ll know more when we get there though.”

Bobby heard Dean's stomach growl even over the sizzle of the eggs. The way Dean was devouring his toast, seemed like the young man had regained his appetite. This eased his mind more than a little. After seeing Dean downing the bourbon, he was more than a little afraid Dean was just going to crawl into a bottle like he had done when his father died. That he would be thanking a vampire, again, for taking care of John's boy, he would have never believed. He couldn't help but wonder what the other 'vegetarian' vampires were like. Like people he supposed. Good and bad. Thoughtful and bastards. And everything in between. John would have had a shit fit that Dean had taken up with a vampire, but this morning's events only reinforced his belief that Sam would have won the man over. Like he had won Bobby over. He had to admit, he was sort of looking forward to sparring with the vampire. It wasn't very often, okay, hell, it never happened that a man had a chance to go up against a supernatural beast—person, he amended—without worrying about the supernatural one actually out to kill him. A man as old as Sam surely knew more than a few tricks.

When the toast popped up Bobby pulled out two plates and split the eggs and toast between himself and Dean. He slid the plate in front of Dean.

"You sound half starved there. Eat up. And stop talking like things will go badly. I don't want to have to go in there and drag both your asses out of that nest. Sam said it'll get ugly. Don't you go getting all self-sacrificing. Don't let Sam neither. You hand yourself over and I will come in after you, even if I have to do it by myself. And you know I mean it."

Bobby sat down at the table and moved the manila folder aside. "Don't be looking so worried. It's going to come out okay. A man can only do what a man can do. Now eat up. We got to make sure Sam and you are up to this. And this will be the first time you two have worked together. Don't want you two falling over each other in the heat of battle."

Bobby looked over toward the door when Jacob walked in. Jacob looked over at the coffee pot and shook his head. "Don't even have a pot of coffee going for me. No breakfast either," he tsked. "You'd make a lousy wife Bobby."

"Maybe that's because I don't have pumpkins," Bobby retorted.

"It doesn't take pumpkins to cook up a breakfast," Jacob said as he started up a fresh pot of coffee. He tossed some bacon into the pan Bobby had used and cracked open a few eggs beside the slices, then dropped some bread into the toaster. "Bobby, keep an eye on that would you? I need to go get some stuff."

"If you weren't going to cook it, why'd you start it?"

"Because you're sitting here eating my eggs and toast. Least you can do is keep the food in the pan from burning."

Bobby snorted and gave a nod.

Jacob whistled as he headed down into the basement. He came up a few minutes later with a trunk which he carried out onto the back porch. He came back in, washed his hands and dished out the meal for himself. "That trunk's got some good stuff for sparring. Armor, wooden weapons, things like that."

Dean couldn’t say he was all that surprised when the older hunter pulled down two plates once the eggs were done and gave him half of them. He wasn’t going to refuse the plate that Bobby handed him though. He wasn’t starved as the older man accused him of, having had a pretty big dinner last night when he and Sam had gotten up in the middle of the night, but since his stomach was feeling better now… damn the vampire for being right… he decided a proper breakfast definitely wouldn’t hurt.

So he joined Bobby at the table and dug into his eggs, all the while ignoring the folder that the older man discretely pushed aside. He couldn’t help but smile a little as the older hunter ‘threatened’ to go into the nest and drag them both out of there if things went bad.

“Yeah, I know.” He replied. He knew Bobby would do it too, even though a part of him had hoped that Bobby wouldn’t. Live to fight another day and all that… but he knew he’d never get Bobby to agree to that. Bobby was just as stubborn as John Winchester ever was, even though the older man would probably smack him over the back of the head for that comparison.

He nodded and continued eating.

Bobby had a point. Sam had said much the same thing. That they had to learn to work together, and they didn’t have a hell of a lot of time to do it in.

When he heard the back door open, Dean turned to look as Jacob came in and then had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing at the exchange between the two older men. Sam was right, Bobby and Jacob really did act like an old married couple. He almost snorted eggs out of his nose when Jacob called Bobby a lousy wife.

Then the old man left and came back carrying a trunk, and he couldn’t help raising an eyebrow in surprise when Jacob explained what was in it. The man was just prepared for anything it seemed. He wondered if Jacob had a bomb shelter somewhere here too.

"Why are you looking so surprised?" Jacob asked Dean at his questioning look. "Sam likes to train even when he's not actively hunting. And I don't like it when he's using real blades. I'm not a hunter. Even with the padding and wooden weapons he still hits hard."

"You didn't tell me you sparred with him," Bobby said.

"Course I did. When he first got me free of the nest, I wanted to learn how to fight and defend myself. Didn't know if any vampires might come after me. Got a little paranoid. I made him teach me. I can protect myself if I have to. I'm probably a lot rusty, but I can manage. I'll help out sparring if you need an extra person."

The front door opened and Sam joined them in the kitchen. "You know Bobby, it's hard to drink my coffee when it's in here."

"You just asked me to reheat it for you," Bobby said, but looked a little guilty. "Would you believe I was waiting for the next pot of coffee to brew?"

Sam laughed. "No." Opening the microwave he grabbed both their coffees, put Bobby's on the table in front of him and took a sip of his own as he leaned against the counter. "We're set up. Got us eleven willing to go in with us. When we get some more intel, a few others may join us if we need the back up. After we do some training I'll look over what you've already found, see what I can pull out of it, maybe piece together a better picture of what we might be fighting."

"I brought the trunk up," Jacob said around a mouthful of toast.

"Thanks Jake. You joining us?"

"Sparring? Sure. The hunt, no way in hell."

"I didn't figure you'd come along on the hunt," Sam said, but glad to hear it all the same.

The coffee finished its final burble and Sam poured everyone a fresh mug. "The sparring weapons are wood for the most part, though there are a couple blade too. The wood is well balanced and has the heft of metal. They're solid enough to break bones, so just keep that in mind." He looked at Dean. "This will really be the first time you've had a chance to explore your enhanced strength and abilities. Yeah, you've fought a few times, but this will give you a chance to take the time and discover what you can and can't do."

Dean shrugged when Jacob got on his case about looking surprised about the trunk of weapons and shit. So Sam and Jacob sparred and shit. How was he supposed to know? As Jake said, he wasn’t a hunter. Dean simply turned his attention back to his eggs.

When Sam came in complaining to Bobby about the older man having forgotten the vampire’s coffee, Dean couldn’t help but smile a bit. Bobby usually wasn’t so absent minded. Well, that was his fault, the older hunter looking after him as usual. Didn’t mean he couldn’t tease the older man about it later on though.

Then Sam started talking about the hunt to come and Dean was definitely surprised when Sam said that there would be eleven other vampires coming with them. Possibly more if they needed backup? That meant that Sam thought there would be at least that many in Vanessa’s nest now. Probably more… Vampires that would know they were coming, were prepared, and out for blood (no pun intended) Jesus Christ…

When Jacob said there was no way in hell he’d be coming along on the hunt, Dean certainly couldn’t blame the man. Maybe he would change his mind about Bobby coming along too. Their chances weren’t very promising to begin with, but they were starting to look even bleaker than before.

Dean looked at Sam when the vampire addressed him, testing out his ‘abilities’… right. Well, he already knew he couldn’t go up against a vampire in a head to head fight, but he nodded anyway. Dean figured it wouldn’t be so different from the training drills his father used to put him through. Probably a lot more intense, but he was ready.

Sam stayed leaning against the counter while the men finished their breakfast. He wouldn't mind sitting down and getting a look at what Bobby had found, his specific interest being who had gone missing, but he didn't want to upset Dean. It could wait. The news wasn't going to change in three minutes or three hours from now. He suspected Vanessa would focus on taking strong fighters, soldiers, or any skilled marksman and that was something he wanted to confirm.

He needed to see just how fast and strong Dean was. There was moving like a vampire and moving like a human. He had to show Dean the difference. If Dean could even do it. He had no idea just how much vampire Dean was. They also needed to see if some of Sam's blood might boost his abilities and for how long. They had so damned much to do and so little time to do it in. He prayed Dean was a fast study.

There was some light banter between Bobby and Jacob, and Sam couldn't help but laugh. He was glad the two men seemed to hit it off. Jake didn't have that many friends anymore, most of them had passed or were just too old to visit. He thought maybe the two men might stay in touch after this, provided they survived it of course.

No, he couldn't be negative. They had enough going against them as it was.

"Okay handsome, finish up. Let's get to training. Thought we might start with a run, see how fast and hard you can run if you put everything into it."

Dean had been right. Sam’s ideas of training weren’t much different from that of his father’s, but a hell of a lot more exhausting, and that was really saying something. He wasn’t sure what Sam had been expecting of him, hell, Dean wasn’t even sure what he’d been expecting of himself, but he got the feeling he’d disappointed the vampire.

As promised, they’d ran a few laps around the house after breakfast. Dean was a pretty good runner, he’d always had been. He and his father would run practically every morning for a few miles at least and that was usually just the start to training. Being able to run fast and hard was essential for a hunter to either run down, or run away from, whatever supernatural beast you were going after. Of course Dean had been slacking off on his routine the past few weeks, for obvious reasons, but he easily fell into pace at his usual level after a brief warm up.

Of course, Sam was able to outpace him easily despite how Dean tried to push himself. It was the same with sparring. Dean had sat on the sidelines resting at first while Sam and Bobby went at it with the sparring swords and the young man was impressed as always by Bobby’s skill with a blade, but Sam of course, was even more impressive. Dean had a feeling that Sam was even slowing it down a bit for Bobby’s sake because the man would never be able to keep up with the vampire otherwise. Once Sam had worn Bobby out, it was Dean’s turn. Dean wasn’t nearly as good with a sword as Bobby and just like earlier he barely kept up with the vampire. By the time they were finished Dean was breathing so hard his chest ached, he was covered in sweat, and his arms felt ready to fall off from blocking the powerful blows of the vampire.

He didn’t move any faster, his reflexes weren’t any better, he wasn’t any stronger and he honestly wasn’t sure how to feel about it. He wasn’t sure if he even wanted to be any of those things, because if he was, that made him less human didn’t it? But if he wasn’t, he was all but useless to Sam.

Dean was leaning against one of the pillars of the porch drinking a glass of ice tea that Jacob had been nice enough to bring out to them. He’d stripped his shirt off not long ago because it was kind of hot at this point and it was covered in sweat anyway. The sun was almost directly overhead by now, almost noon, and he was exhausted.

Sam didn’t say it, but Dean could tell that the vampire was frustrated by his lack of progress. Sam kept trying to push him harder, insisting that he was faster, stronger, than he was, but he wasn’t. He just wasn’t…

Sam had pushed Dean in the running and in the swordplay, but Dean wasn't tapping into his vampiric strength and speed as he had when they had fought that morning. Sam was hoping Dean could tap into it without the emotional turmoil to fuel it but if the virus didn't consider itself threatened, apparently it wasn't willing to help. Dean didn't have the demonic spirit behind it to help call it forth. He would have to learn to call it himself…assuming he could ever learn to do so. He had no idea how long it had taken Jake to master his abilities.

Bobby was good with a sword. Not as good as Sam, but good enough for Sam to get a little comfortable using his machetes against a single blade. He kept his vampiric speed and strength reigned in so as not to hurt Bobby. It allowed him to concentrate on technique which was a good thing as more than once he thought he was going to disarm Bobby only to have Bobby slip out of it, sword still in hand. That frustrated him but also told him if he couldn't disarm Bobby, disarming Vanessa was going to be freaking impossible. He should focus therefore on getting past her defenses. Not a pleasant piece of knowledge to learn but useful. It would change his fighting technique. Once he shifted his mindset, he counted coup on Bobby numerous times, but Bobby slipped through his defenses upon occasional as well, at least until Bobby was worn out.

Dean wasn't as good with a sword, but he was able to withstand some of Sam's full fledged attacks. The hinted at speed and strength seemed to be just below the surface, ready, but not willing. Dammit. Dean might do better with a pump action shot gun, following it up with a blade once he knocked the vampires back. So long as Dean could keep the others off his back, he could focus on Vanessa. He suspected if the bloodmate in Dean sensed Sam was in danger, that too could trigger Dean's abilities.

Ultimately it meant Dean would not get to practice with his talents in advance, assuming they came out, and it meant Sam wouldn't get to see just how fast or slow Dean might move. That was also unfortunate. Maybe come early evening they could go up against Bobby and Jake together. They needed to make certain they didn't fall over each other in battle. Offering Dean blood was an option but it was getting on toward lunchtime and he had pushed his lover hard. A break would be good. Besides, that sun was getting hot and intense and he hadn't put any sunblock on yet and he was beginning to feel the burn.

Walking over to the porch and the welcome shade, he followed Dean's actions and stripped off his sweat-soaked shirt. He tossed the machetes aside with a little frustration. More time dammit. They needed more time.

He took the glass of tea Jacob offered him and drank a good bit of it down. He gave Dean a smile. Damn did Dean look just delicious all sweaty and glistening.

"Good workout." He glanced a little ruefully at Bobby. "And I can tell it's not in my best interest of survival to disarm my opponent."

Nodding from his chair on the porch Bobby said, "Yeah. But I think you were trying too hard, focusing on that instead of the fight."

"Probably," Sam agreed. He gave Dean's shoulder a light squeeze. "Looks like your enhancements aren't willing to show themselves unless you're pissed. I think we ought to load you up with a shotgun in addition to a machete. That'll throw them back, maybe knock them off their feet. You can knock them back and down, giving the others the chance to attack them while they are distracted and off balance. If your enhancements don't show and you start getting low on ammo, then you'll just need to high tail it out of there and fall back to Bobby's position.

"I think we ought to knock off for awhile, cool off. You and Bobby should get a good lunch in you too, maybe catch a few hours of sleep. Then we can do some sparring against Bobby and Jake, clean up, and load up and head out. You good with that plan? Suggestions? Ideas?" Sam flicked his gaze over to Bobby to include him. If he could get Dean to sleep for a few hours, he could look at Bobby's files without upsetting the young hunter.

Dean watched as Sam came up to join them on the porch. Couldn’t help it really, especially when the other man stripped off his own shirt and stood there bare-chested looking absolutely perfect. Then Sam tossed away the machetes he’d been using and his heart sank a little realizing just how much he’d disappointed the vampire.

Yeah. He was useless. He’d already known it, but it still wasn’t pleasant to have it confirmed.

When Sam started talking about giving him a shotgun… yeah, that was about as effective as shooting a bear with a bb-gun, the only effect really making it mad. Let the others, meaning the vampires, handle it. Telling him to run once he was out of ammo. Yeah, like hell he was running. Useless or not he wasn’t going to just hightail it out of there. He might not be a vampire but he was a hunter, damn it.

Then Sam mentioned lunch and Dean merely frowned. He wasn’t the least bit hungry, but he supposed trying to get some sleep wasn’t too bad of an idea, might as well not be exhausted as well as useless.

When Sam asked for ‘suggestions’ and looked to Bobby, Dean glanced at the older hunter as well but kept his mouth shut.

Bobby could see Dean was back in his low self-esteem pity party just from the look of defeat in his eyes and the way his shoulders sagged just a little. Dean didn't do well feeling helpless and powerless. When he killed something evil and supernatural, something that was taking the lives of innocents, that was the only time Dean seemed to be proud of himself. But then that quickly faded and he moved on to the next hunt, burning himself up with guilt and self-loathing until he found that hunt. John Winchester, damn the man, just never told Dean how proud of him he was. The hero worship the youth had for his father didn't help. They were big boots to fill, but John was no saint and sure as hell had his flaws. Not that Dean would ever believe that to be the case. Sometimes he regretted they salted and burned John or he'd call John's spirit up in a god-damned séance and make the man tell Dean the truth and try to knock some sense into that boy.

As much as it pained him, as much as he knew how dangerous it was, even if it meant he might lose Dean, Dean had to know Bobby was proud and had faith in him.

"I think you need to keep Dean at your back. He may not be vampire, but he's one of the finest hunters there is. Neck armor, trap set for you, whatever, that boy will do you more good protecting your back than being outside with me. Give him an elephant gun and I promise you, those vamps will go down, and Dean's one helluva shot. A shot planted right will rip apart any neck armor they've got. Other than that, nope, got nothing to add."

Sam raised an eyebrow at Bobby's words and glanced at his lover. He could smell Dean's disgust with himself and his frustration, but also his determination. Sam wanted to argue, he wanted to keep Dean safe, but one glance back at Bobby and then his lover once again and he gave a nod. "If you feel comfortable with that suggestion Dean, then by all means, you having my back is where I'd prefer you be." He gave a grin. "And vampires are notoriously arrogant. Odds are they'll protect their necks, but not the rest of their bodies because in a vampire showdown, the neck is the target. A 60 caliber pistol will knock an elephant on its butt. Imagine what it'll do to a vampire's face. Or a machete, swung right, can take out knees and arms and hands. They won't protect those parts of themselves…probably. And I honestly believe, when the adrenaline gets going and you're in a life or death situation, you'll find you're going to have the speed and strength you'll need. The demonic virus is programmed for one major thing. Survival. I'd just really wanted you to have a chance to train with it before we went into combat. It can throw you, put you off your game. But you've been a hunter long enough, you'll do okay, no matter what happens," Sam said confidently putting all his belief into that. If Dean was purely human, fighting as a human…he'd be hard pressed going up against a bunch of vamps. Sam would make sure one of the other vamps kept an eye on Dean just in case things went south. There were all going to have to watch each other's backs plain and simple.

"I'm going to grab a quick shower," Sam said. He stepped closer to Dean and whispered, "Room for an extra sweaty body in there with me, you know. I'll even give you a massage afterward if you want."

Dean was surprised, pleased, and a little bit embarrassed all at once from Bobby’s praise. He had honestly expected the older hunter to agree with Sam, that he should stay outside with the rest of the humans, and let the vampires take on the vampires. Dean honestly wasn’t sure he deserved Bobby’s praise. Yeah, he was an ok hunter, if you didn’t count his stupidity for getting caught by the vampire nest in the first place, and to be honest, as much as he hated to admit it, he was afraid that he would be more of a hindrance to Sam than an asset in this fight.

But Bobby did have a point. A well placed heavy round to the neck would do the job just as good, maybe even better, than a machete. There was more than one way to behead a vampire… Dean almost smirked but didn’t. Considering Sam probably wouldn’t appreciate that remark.

He was even more surprised when Sam readily agreed with Bobby’s plan and when the vampire asked him if he did as well, Dean gave a nod. “Sounds good to me.”

When Sam went on to explain the nature of the ‘virus’ inside of him, Dean honestly wasn’t sure what he hoped for. He definitely didn’t want to be useless to Sam in a fight, but with everything else that had happened he hadn’t even had time to deal with the fact that he wasn’t completely human anymore. He didn’t know how much ‘vampire’ he really wanted to be.

Then the look in Sam’s eyes definitely changed when the other man announced he was going to grab a shower and invited him to join him. It definitely wasn’t an offer he was prepared to refuse, and Dean nodded with a slight grin.

“I’m gonna head inside too. Too damn hot out here.” Dean told the older hunter casually. Sure it wasn’t like Bobby didn’t know where he was going and what he was probably going to be up to, but he wasn’t going to broadcast it either.

Bobby rolled his eyes at Dean. "I think I'll just sit out here. Where it's quiet," Bobby said.

Sam smirked but gave a warning glare to Jake to keep his mouth shut. Laughter danced in Jake's eyes but for once, didn't say anything.

As soon as they were out of view of the window, he turned around and faced Dean, pulling him into a kiss. He moaned as he ran his hands over Dean's bare back and pulled him closer, pushing his tongue into Dean's mouth, exploring his lover's mouth and tangling their tongues. He slowly walked backwards, toward their room, delighted Dean wanted to join him. He could already feel himself getting hard. He finally let Dean come up for air then nipped at those lips, sucking Dean's bottom lip into his mouth. As he walked backwards he reached between them and unbuttoned Dean's jeans.

"You have too many clothes on, Lover. Too hot for that," Sam murmured.

Reaching their room he turned Dean around, kicked the door shut, and guided Dean back to the bed. When he felt Dean's legs reach the back of the bed, he gently laid him back and down on to it. "Let me help you undress. For the shower," Sam said. He began kissing his way down Dean's jaw then running his tongue down Dean's neck, savoring the salty taste of Dean's sweat as he pulled open the zipper to Dean's pants.

Dean couldn’t say he was surprised when Sam all but pounced on him as soon as they were out of view of the two older men. Not that Dean was complaining. Not at all. In fact, all he could really do was groan in pleasure as Sam ravished his mouth. He wrapped his arms tightly around his lover’s broad shoulders letting Sam guided them down the hall to their room.

Damn. He thought he was hot before, but Sam’s hands were like fire across his skin. Sam’s kisses made him feel like he was melting and his lover’s cock a hot brand against his own. Dean didn’t even care as his lungs began to burn as well from lack of air. A sound of need and complaint breaking from his lips when the other man finally released them, but the only thought going through Dean’s brain when he felt Sam’s hand at the waistband of his jeans was ‘god, yes.’

He was a little surprised then that Sam’s teasing words actually penetrated through the haze of lust surrounding his brain, and he snorted softly. Too many clothes, like they hadn’t just come in off the porch where Bobby and Jake were. No matter how hot he might be, or how hot Sam made him, he wasn’t about to go buck naked in front of the two older men. Even if it might be worth it to see the look on Sam’s face.

Dean’s amusement faded when Sam suddenly spun them around and he heard the door to their room slam closed behind them. Somehow that alone kicking up his desire another notch and he moaned again, this time a little impatiently, as Sam guided them both to the bed. Dean refusing to release the vampire as Sam laid him down, bringing the other man to the bed with him.

Even though he didn’t really want to think it, it was not lost on Dean that this might be the last time they might be together like this. That was certainly part of the fuel to his desperation as he lifted his hips impatiently when Sam eased the zipper of his jeans down a little too slowly for Dean’s liking. At the same time tilting his head back with a groan to give Sam better access, his fingers tangling in the other man’s hair, as his lover’s tongue explored his neck.

The waves of sheer desire he smelled rolling off his lover was driving Sam crazy. He had been ready for some lovemaking but the need he sensed in Dean had his cock growing harder practically with each passing second. Under his tongue he could feel the pounding of Dean's heart, he could hear the rush of Dean's blood and the spike of pheromones were all having a definite effect. It took all Sam's control not to rip Dean's pants off, bury himself deeply in his bloodmate, and sink his teeth into his lover's neck. When Dean lifted his hips, Sam groaned. Yes, he wanted this, he wanted Dean more than anything.

He pushed Dean's pants and undershorts down, but Dean's boots kept him from pulling them all the way off. Sucking at Dean's neck his hand went to Dean's cock, it already hard and firm under his touch. A growl thrummed in chest as he stroked Dean's member. He needed to taste his lover, needed it desperately. The way Dean tilted his head back, his scent, oh god. His other hand roamed over Dean's chest, caressing, drifting over Dean's nipple, then rubbing and pinching it.

"Need you. Need you so fucking bad," Sam breathed against Dean's neck. A fresh growl spilled from his throat and he pushed Dean down as he straightened up, making Dean release him. He knelt and practically ripped Dean's shoelaces loose and yanked off Dean's boots and pulled the jeans off, then did the same with his own boots, his lust-filled eyes locked on his lover. Dropping his own pants, he kicked them aside. He went to his knees and ran his tongue from the base of Dean's cock up to the tip, licking away the precome dripping from Dean's cock with a deep groan as he fingered Dean's balls, rolling them gently in his fingers.

“Fuck, yeah…” Dean panted when Sam pushed down his jeans and underwear freeing his trapped cock. His lover’s sucking at his neck making him hard as a rock even before Sam wrapped his fingers around his throbbing length, and he groaned as he thrust up into the other man’s fist. His fingers tightening in Sam’s long sweat damp hair as his lover’s fingers caressed his chest and played with his nipple, making him arch beneath the vampire with a groan.

But when Sam suddenly pushed away from him, keeping him pinned to the bed with one hand against his chest not letting him follow, Dean couldn’t help but practically whimper with need.

“Don’t stop.” He begged. Even as he watched the other man slide down the bed and started yanking at his boots. The way Sam tugged sharply at his shoe laces made him a little worried that he might have to get new ones, but then Dean didn’t really give a shit by the time his boots hit the floor along with his jeans and undershorts. Allowing him to spread his legs wider in invitation, licking his lips as he watched Sam strip himself down just as naked.

Then suddenly Sam was there between his legs, licking up his cock and fondling his balls, and Dean’s eyes practically rolled back in his head. His fingers clenching in the sheets beneath him as he moaned, begging for more of his lover’s touch. “Want you. Need you. Sam…”

"You have me," Sam answered as he tasted and teased Dean's crown. "All of me."

His blood fairly boiled for a taste of the sweet crimson pounding in his lover's veins. He purred as he took Dean's cock deep in his throat, firmly holding the man's hips as he went down on him again and again, wrapping his tongue along the rock hard shaft, pulsing his tongue just under the notch of the crown, tasting the precome as it seeped from Dean's tip. He sucked as he pulled off then greedily swallowed Dean again but he wanted more.

He replaced his mouth with his hand, stroking Dean's hard member as his mouth dove deeper, sucking on the flesh encasing Dean's balls, swiping across it with his tongue. He slowly sucked one ball in to his mouth as he stroked Dean's hard cock, giving small twists on the downstrokes and running his palm over his lover's leaking tip to lube his hand further. He toyed with Dean's ball gently then released it only to suck the other one in with a groan. The sound of his lover's heart pounded in his ears, the rush of the blood, the sounds of pleasure he was drawing from his lover mixing with it all. His body burned with need as if he already had tasting his mate's blood.

Finally releasing Dean's balls he licked his way lower, reaching that sweet puckered hole. He twirled his tongue around the edges of it, then began to tongue fuck it, pushing in deeper and harder with each flick of his tongue.

Oh fuck, he loved it when Sam did that. Dean moaned wantonly as his lover took him deep into his throat over and over. The vibrations traveling through his sensitive flesh as Sam purred around his cock would have made him buck up into the vampire’s mouth if Sam didn’t have such a firm grip on his hips.

“Oh god, yeah… fuck… Sam…” Dean gasped, his muscles tensing and trembling with every swipe of his lover’s tongue. His back arching when Sam swallowed and sucked on him so hard that Dean thought the other man was trying to suck the come right out of him. If Sam kept it up much longer he might just succeed.

He couldn’t have stopped the cry that was torn from his lips even if he wanted to when Sam’s mouth suddenly left him. The sudden cold air against his wet cock almost hurt after being incased in the warm wet heat of his lover’s mouth. But before he could even begin to beg the other man to take him in his mouth again, Sam’s fingers were wrapped around his aching flesh, stroking him while his lover’s mouth moved lower to play with his balls.

Dean groaned in the back of his throat and spread his legs wider to give the man he loved all the access he wanted to his most sensitive areas. Sam seemed to pay as much attention to his balls as he had his cock, and the combination of his lover’s hand stroking him while his mouth played with his heavy sack was amazing.

He could feel himself getting closer and closer to the edge, could feel his balls tightening under Sam’s mouth. When he felt his lover’s mouth move again it left him aching in both frustration and anticipation, knowing where Sam was going. When Sam’s tongue stroked over his sensitive hole Dean gasped sharply, his whole body shuddering as his lover’s talented tongue did things to him that should be illegal. Pushing into him making his muscles flutter and clench with pleasure and then relax again begging for more.

“So good… so fucking good…” Dean panted, and then suddenly he knew… if this could be the last time they were together, he didn’t want… them… to be what he remembered. He wanted it to be his choice and he wanted it to be Sam. “Fuck me, Sam… want you in me…”